Faale - Straholmen - UWOL long form

Finn-Erik Faale · August 12th, 2009, 09:01 AM

My UWOL long form 3 is now uploaded.
The video is a "disaster" form the oil country.
I have observed some editing bugs, but I have not time to fix......

Finn-Erik Faale · August 15th, 2009, 06:16 AM

Link to Stråholmen Long Form #3:

Straholmen 3

Mike Sims · August 15th, 2009, 06:59 AM

Finn-Erik,
You have a very good submission this time. The animations are excellent.
I like the way you tied the modern disaster into the Valona tragedy. I have only one suggestion. Where the scene changes from the dark sea to the daylight cemetery, perhaps putting a fade up from black on the cemetery will give a smoother transition. You have made a fine video. It is perhaps one of the few good things to come out of such a horrible occurrence.

Finn-Erik Faale · August 15th, 2009, 07:27 AM

Mike,

Tanks for your comments.
I will follow your suggestion and do a fade up on the cemetery.

Geir Inge · August 17th, 2009, 10:10 AM

Hi Finn-Erik.
I must agree with Mike, me too like the way you tied the oil disaster into the Valona tragedy. I know from todays news that the ship has been drawn from the cliffs.
One question (me and my questions):
Can we expect a change in your original plan due to this oil disaster?
Just curious :)
Great shots, editing and colours.

All the best.
Geir Inge

Vidar Vedaa · August 17th, 2009, 10:27 AM

Hallo Finn Erik.

Its very sad whit the oil, I hope they get a good clean up. We have the MS Server her
on Feije and it end good. I really hope you will make a finale Straaholmen. And you
have allot of nice cut.

All Best
VJV.

Finn-Erik Faale · August 17th, 2009, 01:54 PM

Geir Inge and Vidar, thanks for comments.
After all, I will not change my original plan. But, I will use the oil disaster sequence in the final video.

Catherine Russell · August 17th, 2009, 05:09 PM

Hello Finn-Erik:

You have produced a fine film, and you cover the oil disaster extremely well. Your cinematography is excellent and the presentation of the historic ship scaling back to look like it was sailing on the ocean was very creative. Nicely done, to weave the historic and current disasters together as they both have a huge impact on Straholmen.

This is a tragic and solemn addition to your promising and beautiful film.

Cat

Per Johan Naesje · August 18th, 2009, 04:00 AM

Finn-Erik,
a very sad but interesting piece in the same time! To watch the oil spill in your area and suffer to all creature living there, makes me very, very sad!

The combination of the historic event with Veronica was nice.

There was some issue, with sound however. I often use to make audio cross-over dissolves to avoid those huge jumps in audio levels as you got in some of your scenes.

Your narrating was very nice to listen to. You have a great voice, Finn-Erik!

Finn-Erik Faale · August 18th, 2009, 12:56 PM

Per Johan,
thanks for good advice. I am shamed of the sounding. All is recorded with built-in camera microphone without a good windshield. I think I will have to do some sound recording in post-production.

Chris Swanberg · August 18th, 2009, 09:05 PM

Excellent piece. Good use of shots and good narration. I did notice the sound issue Per Johan mentioned, and the shots of waves were a little dark, but overall a very interesting piece! Well done.

Chris Swanberg

Marj Atkins · August 19th, 2009, 01:01 AM

Hi Finn-Erik - Sorry I didn't manage to watch your submission for round 2 - I will comment on both this time round.

Your video work is very nice. It always seems to have a peaceful, structured feel to it. Your shots in general are carefully considered and a treat for the eye and your talented guitar playing complements these beautiful images.

After watching your sequences I am really taken with Stråholmen - it is very picturesque has some beautiful wildlife and has some interesting stories to tell - good choice of subject in that respect. Your shots of the various birds and animals are very crisp and the colours are good. I enjoyed the delightful Oystercatcher in particular. I was fascinated by your first shot of the swan in your second submission - it came as quite a surprise to see one of the pieces of ice floating on the water turn into a beautiful swan! :)

It is nice to hear your voice this time round! Your voice is clear and pleasant to listen to. Although I do realize it is very difficult to do when you are speaking a foreign language, which you do very well, it would lift the mood and heighten the interest a lot if you added a little more expression/emotion while telling your story. It comes across as being very matter-of-fact.

Something to think about when structuring your story:
I realize that you are probably wanting to do a simple story about Stråholmen, but in order to give a bit of strength to your story, consider putting more focus on the contrasting situations and moods that can be and have been experienced here - the almost idyllic serenity of the island (as witnessed by views of your boat and lovely scenery) as opposed to the perils of the sea (as witnessed by the oil spill and the wreck of the Valona.)

Another suggestion to consider: You have had a good, meaningful story drop into your lap - Stråholmen in the third round is not the same as when you started - the story in real life has taken a turn - what are the implications? Seeing the main attraction of Stråholmen - the stunning scenery and its wildlife - at stake is dismaying and it could perhaps be used to great effect. In this respect your shots of the oil spill and the damage it has caused could be a bit more dynamic (rather than calmly beautiful) with the inclusion of some quicker camera shots and use of diagonals in the framing. It would be good to convey the urgency of the situation in mopping up. It would be good to get your viewers more involved to appreciate what is actually at stake here and why it “will bleed for a long time”. Your story could be used to send a strong message to your viewers rather than remain a simple portrait of a beautiful place on earth experiencing a sad interlude.

Dale Guthormsen · August 19th, 2009, 06:40 PM

Fin,

Have to agree with prior posts. Good use of graphics and I really liked the grapic drawing back to the ocean. It took me a bit to realize you were using the dark ocean as an ominous factor in your film.

It is coming along great.

the finale should be real nice.

Oh yea, I liked the pace of the audio and you do have a terrific voice for voice overs, as per mentioned.

You need to get an external mic for you camera, or perhaps borrow one.

Finn-Erik Faale · August 20th, 2009, 02:59 PM

Tanks so much for comments.

Marj,
Thank you for good suggestions. I will try to follow your wise advices and do more out of the contrasted sequence and voice over. My native language will be used in the final version.

Dale,
I will bring with me an external microphone on my next visit to Stråholmen.
The weather has been unstable for a long period. The rain is falling heavily outside my window at this moment. I hope the weather will improve this weekend so I can go to the island.

Mat Thompson · August 21st, 2009, 04:42 AM

Hi Finn- Erik

What a mess we humans can create huh ! - This story has the potential to be quite hard hitting. However at the moment I find the edit quite flat and monotone. I think Marj has given you a fantastic critique talking about more heavilly using comparisons in your imagery and building a better back story. - You have good shots, the building blocks of what you need but this is an emotive and sad story and want to feel that more when I watch the images. The use of music/score/sounds will of course help this a lot too.

Good start and I look forward to your progress on this.

Mat

August 17th, 2009, 10:10 AM	#35
Geir Inge Trustee Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Larsnes, Norway Posts: 1,343	Hi Finn-Erik. I must agree with Mike, me too like the way you tied the oil disaster into the Valona tragedy. I know from todays news that the ship has been drawn from the cliffs. One question (me and my questions): Can we expect a change in your original plan due to this oil disaster? Just curious :) Great shots, editing and colours. All the best. Geir Inge __________________ Geir Inge B. Brekke Visit me at: https://vimeo.com/gibbfilm

August 17th, 2009, 10:27 AM	#36
Vidar Vedaa Major Player Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: bergen norway Posts: 235	Hallo Finn Erik. Its very sad whit the oil, I hope they get a good clean up. We have the MS Server her on Feije and it end good. I really hope you will make a finale Straaholmen. And you have allot of nice cut. All Best VJV. __________________ WestCoast-film. www.vidarvedaa.com

August 18th, 2009, 04:00 AM	#39
Per Johan Naesje Trustee Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Akershus, Norway Posts: 1,413	Finn-Erik, a very sad but interesting piece in the same time! To watch the oil spill in your area and suffer to all creature living there, makes me very, very sad! The combination of the historic event with Veronica was nice. There was some issue, with sound however. I often use to make audio cross-over dissolves to avoid those huge jumps in audio levels as you got in some of your scenes. Your narrating was very nice to listen to. You have a great voice, Finn-Erik! __________________ - Per Johan

August 19th, 2009, 06:40 PM	#43
Dale Guthormsen Inner Circle Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Saskatchewan Posts: 3,048	Fin, Have to agree with prior posts. Good use of graphics and I really liked the grapic drawing back to the ocean. It took me a bit to realize you were using the dark ocean as an ominous factor in your film. It is coming along great. the finale should be real nice. Oh yea, I liked the pace of the audio and you do have a terrific voice for voice overs, as per mentioned. You need to get an external mic for you camera, or perhaps borrow one. __________________ DATS ALL FOLKS Dale W. Guthormsen

August 12th, 2009, 09:01 AM	#31
Finn-Erik Faale Major Player Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Porsgrunn Norway Posts: 280	My UWOL long form 3 is now uploaded. The video is a "disaster" form the oil country. I have observed some editing bugs, but I have not time to fix......

August 15th, 2009, 06:16 AM	#32
Finn-Erik Faale Major Player Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Porsgrunn Norway Posts: 280	Link to Stråholmen Long Form #3: Straholmen 3

August 15th, 2009, 06:59 AM	#33
Mike Sims Major Player Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: San Antonio, Texas Posts: 880	Finn-Erik, You have a very good submission this time. The animations are excellent. I like the way you tied the modern disaster into the Valona tragedy. I have only one suggestion. Where the scene changes from the dark sea to the daylight cemetery, perhaps putting a fade up from black on the cemetery will give a smoother transition. You have made a fine video. It is perhaps one of the few good things to come out of such a horrible occurrence.

August 15th, 2009, 07:27 AM	#34
Finn-Erik Faale Major Player Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Porsgrunn Norway Posts: 280	Mike, Tanks for your comments. I will follow your suggestion and do a fade up on the cemetery.

August 17th, 2009, 01:54 PM	#37
Finn-Erik Faale Major Player Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Porsgrunn Norway Posts: 280	Geir Inge and Vidar, thanks for comments. After all, I will not change my original plan. But, I will use the oil disaster sequence in the final video.

August 17th, 2009, 05:09 PM	#38
Catherine Russell Trustee Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Lyons, Colorado Posts: 1,224	Hello Finn-Erik: You have produced a fine film, and you cover the oil disaster extremely well. Your cinematography is excellent and the presentation of the historic ship scaling back to look like it was sailing on the ocean was very creative. Nicely done, to weave the historic and current disasters together as they both have a huge impact on Straholmen. This is a tragic and solemn addition to your promising and beautiful film. Cat

August 18th, 2009, 12:56 PM	#40
Finn-Erik Faale Major Player Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Porsgrunn Norway Posts: 280	Per Johan, thanks for good advice. I am shamed of the sounding. All is recorded with built-in camera microphone without a good windshield. I think I will have to do some sound recording in post-production.

August 18th, 2009, 09:05 PM	#41
Chris Swanberg Major Player Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Sacramento, CA Posts: 904	Excellent piece. Good use of shots and good narration. I did notice the sound issue Per Johan mentioned, and the shots of waves were a little dark, but overall a very interesting piece! Well done. Chris Swanberg

August 19th, 2009, 01:01 AM	#42
Marj Atkins Major Player Join Date: May 2007 Location: Johannesburg South Africa Posts: 768	Hi Finn-Erik - Sorry I didn't manage to watch your submission for round 2 - I will comment on both this time round. Your video work is very nice. It always seems to have a peaceful, structured feel to it. Your shots in general are carefully considered and a treat for the eye and your talented guitar playing complements these beautiful images. After watching your sequences I am really taken with Stråholmen - it is very picturesque has some beautiful wildlife and has some interesting stories to tell - good choice of subject in that respect. Your shots of the various birds and animals are very crisp and the colours are good. I enjoyed the delightful Oystercatcher in particular. I was fascinated by your first shot of the swan in your second submission - it came as quite a surprise to see one of the pieces of ice floating on the water turn into a beautiful swan! :) It is nice to hear your voice this time round! Your voice is clear and pleasant to listen to. Although I do realize it is very difficult to do when you are speaking a foreign language, which you do very well, it would lift the mood and heighten the interest a lot if you added a little more expression/emotion while telling your story. It comes across as being very matter-of-fact. Something to think about when structuring your story: I realize that you are probably wanting to do a simple story about Stråholmen, but in order to give a bit of strength to your story, consider putting more focus on the contrasting situations and moods that can be and have been experienced here - the almost idyllic serenity of the island (as witnessed by views of your boat and lovely scenery) as opposed to the perils of the sea (as witnessed by the oil spill and the wreck of the Valona.) Another suggestion to consider: You have had a good, meaningful story drop into your lap - Stråholmen in the third round is not the same as when you started - the story in real life has taken a turn - what are the implications? Seeing the main attraction of Stråholmen - the stunning scenery and its wildlife - at stake is dismaying and it could perhaps be used to great effect. In this respect your shots of the oil spill and the damage it has caused could be a bit more dynamic (rather than calmly beautiful) with the inclusion of some quicker camera shots and use of diagonals in the framing. It would be good to convey the urgency of the situation in mopping up. It would be good to get your viewers more involved to appreciate what is actually at stake here and why it “will bleed for a long time”. Your story could be used to send a strong message to your viewers rather than remain a simple portrait of a beautiful place on earth experiencing a sad interlude.

August 20th, 2009, 02:59 PM	#44
Finn-Erik Faale Major Player Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Porsgrunn Norway Posts: 280	Tanks so much for comments. Marj, Thank you for good suggestions. I will try to follow your wise advices and do more out of the contrasted sequence and voice over. My native language will be used in the final version. Dale, I will bring with me an external microphone on my next visit to Stråholmen. The weather has been unstable for a long period. The rain is falling heavily outside my window at this moment. I hope the weather will improve this weekend so I can go to the island.

August 21st, 2009, 04:42 AM	#45
Mat Thompson Trustee Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Kent UK Posts: 1,397	Hi Finn- Erik What a mess we humans can create huh ! - This story has the potential to be quite hard hitting. However at the moment I find the edit quite flat and monotone. I think Marj has given you a fantastic critique talking about more heavilly using comparisons in your imagery and building a better back story. - You have good shots, the building blocks of what you need but this is an emotive and sad story and want to feel that more when I watch the images. The use of music/score/sounds will of course help this a lot too. Good start and I look forward to your progress on this. Mat