Ridiculous Job Offers / Demands!!

Dave Herring · January 23rd, 2006, 03:07 AM

It's like anything else, my Ma would say:

"Lay down with the dogs, you get up smelling like one."

Besides, what would I tell my daughter's friends that I do professionally during the Great American Teach-In day at school? Not to mention my daughter.

It's a tough business, but you gotta set parameters, porn work (and I've been offered plenty) is kinda like working in pro boxing. Everybody knows the cash is king, but you gotta sell your soul to bring it in.

Josh Bass · January 23rd, 2006, 03:17 AM

I was discussing, through a posting on craiglist, a documentary on swingers. It was a few days shoot, I seem to remember a decent rate, and though it was a bit freakier than I would like, I didn't see any real problem with it. Then, late at night, I caught a low budget documentary on VH1 about swingers, and they actually had camera guys in the room filming 'em doin' it (they didn't show the doin' of the it, of course, but I'm sure the guy still shot it), and I got to thinkin' , "oh crap, I might have to film people doin' it. That's f*cked up." So I emailed this person with my concerns, saying that if that was a possibility, I would have to decline the gig. Never heard back. Guess that was a yes on the doin' it, then.

Dave Herring · January 23rd, 2006, 03:35 AM

Absolutely!

Porn companies are sneaky too...
Excerpt from St. Pete Times (link was too long)

January 18

The rumors started swirling last June, when a slew of beefy actors and comely actresses showed up at the Pier in St. Petersburg to film a TV movie aboard the HMS Bounty.

Those who weren't lugging cameras and cables were decked in full- blown pirate garb, which didn't faze Bounty officials. Lots of pirate films shoot scenes aboard the historic tall ship; in fact, the Bounty crew had just rented the boat to Disney for the Pirates of the Caribbean sequels.

But as families, fishermen and tourists passed throughout the Pier, people began to suspect that this pirate movie was different.

You know what they're doing there, right? workers would whisper. You know they're shooting a porn flick?

Check out the rest of the story ( sptimes.com ) it's titled "Yo, Ho, Ho!"

Imagine, if I would have been involved with a production like that, I would never find work in or around St. Pete again. Like the Visitors and Convention Bureau for example (they get lots of state money for productions), I'd be blackballed, certainly.

I do get legitimate work through craigslist locally, just picked up a significant client for March. Many upstart companies, who will pay the rate, just have no clue how to find specialized technical skills, especially when it comes to video production.

But craigslist is a hoot, lots of nutty stuff too. It sure beats the classifieds.

Josh Bass · January 23rd, 2006, 04:11 AM

From your link:

"With a budget of more than $1-million, the two-hour film has been hailed as a pornographic mold-breaker. It was filmed in high definition, and its special effects, including an army of computer- generated skeletons, took months to create."

Why, God, why? I mean, really, why? What was the point? Who's watching it for the skeletons?

K. Forman · January 23rd, 2006, 07:04 AM

While all of these Craigslist jobs are fun to laugh at, they are also pretty much all I find. I have a well used GL1, and nobody wants to see that. Everyone is expecting an XL1, or even better, a DVX that can do 24P. The way I see it, I'll do whatever pays. I've done enough filler work, and I've done my share of low pay work. Enough of that.

Dave Herring · January 23rd, 2006, 08:03 AM

Josh, I guess it has something to do with 'boners'. Sorry, that was too easy.

Keith, I hear ya man, gotta get that rate. Believe me, I've done my share of low paying shoots too.

Any port in a storm, but be careful if you do the porn thing.

K. Forman · January 23rd, 2006, 09:21 AM

I'll be sure to wear a rain coat, just in case there are any mishaps with the money shot :)

Dave Herring · January 23rd, 2006, 12:08 PM

That was hysterical!! (sp?)

Did you see the b-roll add that just went up in 'Helping Hands'?

K. Forman · January 23rd, 2006, 12:24 PM

Yes, I did. And he wants nice Hi Def stuff, and my GL1 barely does Standard Def. Not the first job I've had to pass on because of my cam. Sounds like it's right up your alley though.

James Emory · January 23rd, 2006, 02:17 PM

Wannabees! They need to write me a letter telling me why I should consider them. I just love how these types start off by wanting an office worker and it morphs into must also be proficient in these 7 software suites.. Too much justification going on with this company, shadeeeeee!!!

"ATL/LA/NYC TV and Commercial Production Company is looking for incredibly smart multi-talented, multi-tasking and ambitious Atlanta-based freelance Production Assistant.

This is not for the lazy "grab me a coffee" type. Long hours, running around, lots of pressure and lots of expectations. Duties will range from scheduling, dubbing, fielding calls for all our offices, to on-set work, client service and file delivery/edits/image reformatting. If you're not one of the smartest people you know, and if you're not insanely passionate about a serious production job-- do not waste your time.

An advanced working knowledge of Macs is required. Final Cut Pro, After Effects, Photoshop, Illustrator, Shake, ftp, html, Fetch are serious bonuses.

The position is currently freelance for a month, but could turn into a more consistent position if you're the one.

Email resume and cover letter. Tell us about you.

About us: We are a new, small, but very well respected and incredibly busy TV and commercial production company. Our clients are mostly LA and NYC media companies. We have offices in LA/NYC and here in Atlanta. The leaders of our company represent over 30 years experience and expertise in film and television and have been recognized for their work by the AIGA, BDA, Promax and the Academy of Television Arts and Sciences.

Job location is Atlanta

Compensation: $125/day Freelance plus workday milage, minus applicable witholdings

Josh Bass · January 23rd, 2006, 02:38 PM

Sounds like 2-300 a day, to me.

Here's a tip: PAs, by definition, don't need advanced knowledge of any of the aforementioned software programs. That's why they're PAs and not assistant editors, or something.

Nick Hiltgen · January 24th, 2006, 12:48 AM

Sweet! All that time I spent learning shake finally paid off! What? ILM is on the phone? Nah I'd much rather get paid 125 a day...and get abused by these jerks.

I really want to start applying for these things.

Josh Bass · January 24th, 2006, 01:03 AM

People in NYC claim they do just that. . .apply, get accepted, never show.

K. Forman · January 24th, 2006, 06:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nick Hiltgen

Sweet! All that time I spent learning shake finally paid off! What? ILM is on the phone? Nah I'd much rather get paid 125 a day...and get abused by these jerks.

I really want to start applying for these things.

But do you know Houdini? There is a company down here looking for 10 Houdini artists right now. I'm really out of the loop, because I had to google it to find out what it was :)

K. Forman · January 24th, 2006, 09:05 AM

Here is one that, aside from the ebonics and caplocks... and some other issues, is paying well-

LOOKING 4 BADASS FC EDITOR
Reply to: SOBECLASSICs@hotmail.com
Date: 2006-01-23, 8:11PM EST

I WANT A FINAL CUT EDITOR TO MAKE MY BORING COPORATE 15 MINUTE PIECE LOOK LIKE A 60 MINUTES OR DATELINE NBC PIECE. MUST USE FINAL CUT , MOTION AND LIVE TYPE..
$200 A DAY. EMAIL ME @ SOBECLASSICS@HOTMAIL.COM

* Job location is COCONUT GROVE
* Compensation: $200 A DAY

I left his email, just in case there are some FCP users that have an interest.

January 23rd, 2006, 03:17 AM	#377
Josh Bass Slash Rules! Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Houston, Texas Posts: 5,472	I was discussing, through a posting on craiglist, a documentary on swingers. It was a few days shoot, I seem to remember a decent rate, and though it was a bit freakier than I would like, I didn't see any real problem with it. Then, late at night, I caught a low budget documentary on VH1 about swingers, and they actually had camera guys in the room filming 'em doin' it (they didn't show the doin' of the it, of course, but I'm sure the guy still shot it), and I got to thinkin' , "oh crap, I might have to film people doin' it. That's f*cked up." So I emailed this person with my concerns, saying that if that was a possibility, I would have to decline the gig. Never heard back. Guess that was a yes on the doin' it, then. __________________ The Bass' camerawork The Bass on IMDB

January 23rd, 2006, 04:11 AM	#379
Josh Bass Slash Rules! Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Houston, Texas Posts: 5,472	From your link: "With a budget of more than $1-million, the two-hour film has been hailed as a pornographic mold-breaker. It was filmed in high definition, and its special effects, including an army of computer- generated skeletons, took months to create." Why, God, why? I mean, really, why? What was the point? Who's watching it for the skeletons? __________________ The Bass' camerawork The Bass on IMDB

January 23rd, 2006, 07:04 AM	#380
K. Forman Capt. Quirk Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Middle of the woods in Georgia Posts: 3,596	While all of these Craigslist jobs are fun to laugh at, they are also pretty much all I find. I have a well used GL1, and nobody wants to see that. Everyone is expecting an XL1, or even better, a DVX that can do 24P. The way I see it, I'll do whatever pays. I've done enough filler work, and I've done my share of low pay work. Enough of that. __________________ www.SmokeWagonLeather.us

January 23rd, 2006, 09:21 AM	#382
K. Forman Capt. Quirk Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Middle of the woods in Georgia Posts: 3,596	I'll be sure to wear a rain coat, just in case there are any mishaps with the money shot :) __________________ www.SmokeWagonLeather.us

January 23rd, 2006, 12:24 PM	#384
K. Forman Capt. Quirk Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Middle of the woods in Georgia Posts: 3,596	Yes, I did. And he wants nice Hi Def stuff, and my GL1 barely does Standard Def. Not the first job I've had to pass on because of my cam. Sounds like it's right up your alley though. __________________ www.SmokeWagonLeather.us

January 23rd, 2006, 03:07 AM	#376
Dave Herring Regular Crew Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Indian Rocks Beach, Florida Posts: 67	It's like anything else, my Ma would say: "Lay down with the dogs, you get up smelling like one." Besides, what would I tell my daughter's friends that I do professionally during the Great American Teach-In day at school? Not to mention my daughter. It's a tough business, but you gotta set parameters, porn work (and I've been offered plenty) is kinda like working in pro boxing. Everybody knows the cash is king, but you gotta sell your soul to bring it in.

January 23rd, 2006, 03:35 AM	#378
Dave Herring Regular Crew Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Indian Rocks Beach, Florida Posts: 67	Absolutely! Porn companies are sneaky too... Excerpt from St. Pete Times (link was too long) January 18 The rumors started swirling last June, when a slew of beefy actors and comely actresses showed up at the Pier in St. Petersburg to film a TV movie aboard the HMS Bounty. Those who weren't lugging cameras and cables were decked in full- blown pirate garb, which didn't faze Bounty officials. Lots of pirate films shoot scenes aboard the historic tall ship; in fact, the Bounty crew had just rented the boat to Disney for the Pirates of the Caribbean sequels. But as families, fishermen and tourists passed throughout the Pier, people began to suspect that this pirate movie was different. You know what they're doing there, right? workers would whisper. You know they're shooting a porn flick? Check out the rest of the story ( sptimes.com ) it's titled "Yo, Ho, Ho!" Imagine, if I would have been involved with a production like that, I would never find work in or around St. Pete again. Like the Visitors and Convention Bureau for example (they get lots of state money for productions), I'd be blackballed, certainly. I do get legitimate work through craigslist locally, just picked up a significant client for March. Many upstart companies, who will pay the rate, just have no clue how to find specialized technical skills, especially when it comes to video production. But craigslist is a hoot, lots of nutty stuff too. It sure beats the classifieds.

January 23rd, 2006, 08:03 AM	#381
Dave Herring Regular Crew Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Indian Rocks Beach, Florida Posts: 67	Josh, I guess it has something to do with 'boners'. Sorry, that was too easy. Keith, I hear ya man, gotta get that rate. Believe me, I've done my share of low paying shoots too. Any port in a storm, but be careful if you do the porn thing.

January 23rd, 2006, 12:08 PM	#383
Dave Herring Regular Crew Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Indian Rocks Beach, Florida Posts: 67	That was hysterical!! (sp?) Did you see the b-roll add that just went up in 'Helping Hands'?

January 23rd, 2006, 02:17 PM	#385
James Emory Regular Crew Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: Atlanta, Georgia Posts: 1,892	Wannabees! They need to write me a letter telling me why I should consider them. I just love how these types start off by wanting an office worker and it morphs into must also be proficient in these 7 software suites.. Too much justification going on with this company, shadeeeeee!!! "ATL/LA/NYC TV and Commercial Production Company is looking for incredibly smart multi-talented, multi-tasking and ambitious Atlanta-based freelance Production Assistant. This is not for the lazy "grab me a coffee" type. Long hours, running around, lots of pressure and lots of expectations. Duties will range from scheduling, dubbing, fielding calls for all our offices, to on-set work, client service and file delivery/edits/image reformatting. If you're not one of the smartest people you know, and if you're not insanely passionate about a serious production job-- do not waste your time. An advanced working knowledge of Macs is required. Final Cut Pro, After Effects, Photoshop, Illustrator, Shake, ftp, html, Fetch are serious bonuses. The position is currently freelance for a month, but could turn into a more consistent position if you're the one. Email resume and cover letter. Tell us about you. About us: We are a new, small, but very well respected and incredibly busy TV and commercial production company. Our clients are mostly LA and NYC media companies. We have offices in LA/NYC and here in Atlanta. The leaders of our company represent over 30 years experience and expertise in film and television and have been recognized for their work by the AIGA, BDA, Promax and the Academy of Television Arts and Sciences. Job location is Atlanta Compensation: $125/day Freelance plus workday milage, minus applicable witholdings

January 23rd, 2006, 02:38 PM	#386
Josh Bass Slash Rules! Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Houston, Texas Posts: 5,472	Sounds like 2-300 a day, to me. Here's a tip: PAs, by definition, don't need advanced knowledge of any of the aforementioned software programs. That's why they're PAs and not assistant editors, or something. __________________ The Bass' camerawork The Bass on IMDB

January 24th, 2006, 12:48 AM	#387
Nick Hiltgen Trustee Join Date: May 2003 Location: Atlanta GA Posts: 1,427	Sweet! All that time I spent learning shake finally paid off! What? ILM is on the phone? Nah I'd much rather get paid 125 a day...and get abused by these jerks. I really want to start applying for these things. __________________ I have a dream that one day canon will release a 35mm ef to xl adapter and I'll have iris control and a 35mm dof of all my ef lenses, and it will be awesome...

January 24th, 2006, 01:03 AM	#388
Josh Bass Slash Rules! Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Houston, Texas Posts: 5,472	People in NYC claim they do just that. . .apply, get accepted, never show. __________________ The Bass' camerawork The Bass on IMDB

January 24th, 2006, 09:05 AM	#390
K. Forman Capt. Quirk Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Middle of the woods in Georgia Posts: 3,596	Here is one that, aside from the ebonics and caplocks... and some other issues, is paying well- LOOKING 4 BADASS FC EDITOR Reply to: SOBECLASSICs@hotmail.com Date: 2006-01-23, 8:11PM EST I WANT A FINAL CUT EDITOR TO MAKE MY BORING COPORATE 15 MINUTE PIECE LOOK LIKE A 60 MINUTES OR DATELINE NBC PIECE. MUST USE FINAL CUT , MOTION AND LIVE TYPE.. $200 A DAY. EMAIL ME @ SOBECLASSICS@HOTMAIL.COM * Job location is COCONUT GROVE * Compensation: $200 A DAY I left his email, just in case there are some FCP users that have an interest. __________________ www.SmokeWagonLeather.us