Ridiculous Job Offers / Demands!!

Josh Bass · January 16th, 2006, 06:20 PM

Kinda off topic--

How come they always say "serious applicants only".

Am I going to apply as a joke (well, some of you people might)?

James Emory · January 16th, 2006, 06:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Josh Bass

Kinda off topic--

How come they always say "serious applicants only".

Am I going to apply as a joke (well, some of you people might)?

Because they don't want clowns working on their serious, professional and did I mention deferred project.

It seems like it would be the opposite. Wanting naive people that will believe their crap and buy into their wonder project.

These types of folks and posts just make me want to VOMICK!!

Josh Bass · January 16th, 2006, 06:39 PM

Yeah, but see, if you have big serious dreams, you don't want the naive, even if they are more pliable, on your project.

I dunno, I wouldn't trust someone too much that I wasn't paying unless it was a collaboration with a longtime friend. But I'd treat 'em reaaaaaaaaal good. Cause they got no reason to stay.

Josh Bass · January 17th, 2006, 02:15 AM

I guess this isn't that crazy. . .but it's certainly ambitious for not paying--

Hey, guess who doesn't work for free? Key Grips, FX people, fight choreographers. I don't know about the rest. I guess if they'll take anyone, then no big whoop, seriously, why would anyone with enough experience to call themselves a Key grip, for instance, do this?

"Reply to: aktsfilm@yahoo.com
Date: 2006-01-15, 2:59AM CST

Hello All,
From the Flames Productions is currently in Pre-production for a
30-minute short romantic comedy that will be shot in the Austin area.
We are seeking experienced crewmembers. We are in need of:

Asst. fight choreographer
Gaffer assistant
Key grip
Sound tech
FX makeup artist- someone with knowledge of liquid latex, adhesives, and prosthetics.
Production assistants
Continuity person- some one with a very good eye for details.
Craft services- someone who can assist me in the kitchen with catering meals for the cast and crew during the shoots.
Cameraman who has experience with the canon XL series cameras,
Wardrobe/props manager.

We are also in need of a very talented seamstress, who can make custom dress for a fairy/goddess character.

WE NEED still photographers who will document the production process for us.
(If you respond for photographer, please attach some examples of your work.
We will also need a storyboard artist (if you respond for story board artist, please attach some examples of your work, and let me know how quick you are)

We are also seeking local bands that would like a chance to be featured
on the soundtrack.

We will consider RTF students in their Jr. and Sr. year who are looking
to add to their resume.

This short film will be entered into multiple film festivals in 2006
and 2007.

We will be filming on WEEKENDS in February and possibly March.
Please submit Resumes, Reels and Demos to aktsfilm@yahoo.com

Also, if you have questions please feel free to contact me at the same
email address.
Compensation: A copy of the finished DVD, screen credit, credit and a
listing on the website, a link to a resume or approved website, and the
chance to have their talent highlighted in the film festival circuit.
This film will be listed on IMDB, and will be listed with the WGA.
This is a low budget short, so there will not be any monetary
compensation.
Take care,
Robin Blesch
Producer

* this is in or around Austin, TX"

James Emory · January 17th, 2006, 08:20 PM

4 hours max? Well that makes me feel better. No, wait a minute, that's just for the hours of shooting not including editing. Oh, I get to do that for free? Ok, thanks!

"Professional Videographer needed for an event to be held Monday Jan. 30th.

Filming will last for at least 3 hours. Must be able to produce High-Quality video & also finished edited product. Digital equipment perferred be not required.

Must have previous work experience (video) to submit as examples.

The job pays $25 per hour with 3 hour minimum & 4 hour max. :)

For more info feel free to call Xxxxxxxxxxx or respond to email below."

Josh Bass · January 17th, 2006, 10:23 PM

If the editing paid, I'd do it. If not, then yeah, it's crap.

Josh Bass · January 17th, 2006, 10:49 PM

Ok, I got the best one ever.

"Two photographers documenting our erotic time in the homes of others - some friends, some strangers. If you'd be willing to donate your space for us to use as a set of sorts, please contact us. Your compensation is photo and video of us in your home. You can see a few of our images at

flickr.com/photos/tetheredtothesun

a site which will be fully updated in the next week. Plenty of personal and professional references to assure you as to the safety of your home - we'll leave it as we found it and we only need a few hours. As long as its empty - its perfect.

* this is in or around Houston
* no -- it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
* Compensation: Photo/Video documentation "

Josh Bass · January 17th, 2006, 11:30 PM

And another, more relevant:

"Need students and talent for Capitol Records shoot
Reply to: gigs-126237520@craigslist.org
Date: 2006-01-17, 10:03PM EST

We have been asked by Capitol Records to produce a demo music video for recently signed band, Hurt. www.hurtband.com. We need talented visual artists to help us produce a worthy demo for the record label. This is a non-paying gig but if we are granted the contract we will be operating under a full scale budget. Visual FX people and makeup artists are something that we really need. Check out our affiliate at www.buzzmediaproductions.com

* this is in or around NJ
* no -- it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
* Compensation: Future consideration for major label projects "

Damn. . .too bad those record companies are so poor and can't pay their crews.

James Emory · January 18th, 2006, 04:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Josh Bass

If the editing paid, I'd do it. If not, then yeah, it's crap.

You mean to tell me that you would shoot with your camera for four hours for $100 or $25/hour? What would you do, charge $200 / hour to edit to make up for the loss in the shoot?

James Emory · January 18th, 2006, 04:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Josh Bass

We have been asked by Capitol Records to produce a demo music video for recently signed band, Hurt.

Looks like they're hurting for money! :O

Josh Bass · January 18th, 2006, 05:54 AM

I don't know 'bout you, dude, but I don't seem to be able to command a whole hell of a lot for a shoot with the XL1s. So, yeah, 25 an hour ain't too bad for me. I understand if it doesn't work for you, but that's you. Keep in mind, that's $250 a day if it's a 10 hour day, and that's not a bad rate for me.

James Emory · January 18th, 2006, 11:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Josh Bass

I don't know 'bout you, dude, but I don't seem to be able to command a whole hell of a lot for a shoot with the XL1s. So, yeah, 25 an hour ain't too bad for me. I understand if it doesn't work for you, but that's you. Keep in mind, that's $250 a day if it's a 10 hour day, and that's not a bad rate for me.

It ain't $250/day when that cheapass above is paying you and that's what I'm talking about!! $250/day is what you should be charging for your camera alone. That's what I do and the labor is extra.

James Emory · January 18th, 2006, 01:04 PM

"Producer is looking to partner up with other Producers/Directors splitting the costs on Film/Television projects. I prefer to work with someone who has partial funds between $100,000 and $1 million and who has already selected the project to be produced. Please contact me at xxx.xxx.xxxx.

Compensation: $500"

Uhhh, who wouldn't? What does $500 mean for this inquiry anyway?

I prefer to own a $100K Cine Alta F900 instead of a $3500 XL-1.

Josh Bass · January 18th, 2006, 05:40 PM

James, I commend you for being able to get those rates for a camera alone, especiallys since most rental houses (around here, can't speak for anywhere else) only charge $175 for their DVXs). I cannot.

Anyway, this one wouldn't be that notable except for the attitude:

"THIS WEEKEND: Videographer/Cameraperson for MA documentary short
Reply to: gigs-126419019@craigslist.org
Date: 2006-01-18, 2:51PM EST

THIS WEEKEND, we're shooting some B roll for a mini-documentary on a martial arts legend. This martial artist is arguably one of the best self-defense practitioners in the world, and certainly one of the most controversial.

We have a Sony TRV900 (though you can use your own equipment if you prefer) and a shotgun mic. We're looking for someone to videotape during the seminar(s). Prefer a martial artist enthusiast. It will be either Saturday or Sunday (flexible), and you will be working with a director. There is no pay available. We are offering one month of quality instruction in our school, and of course you gain access to these exclusive seminars with this master--which we guarantee will not be boring. He is also one of the most charming and funny personalities you will meet.

[asshole]Please don't respond if you don't have experience getting good shots as a videographer. We could ask any one of the students to hold a camera; we want someone who knows how to shoot. Please send a resume, cover letter, and if possible some links to your material.[/asshole]

* There's also a brief interview with him that we're working out for Sunday, and may need minimal lights (or someone who knows how to light with practicals), so if you take an interest and want to contribute further, we would not turn you away.

Thanks for looking! "

My, aren't we cocky for a non-paying gig! And I like how they somehow learned the meaning of "practicals".

K. Forman · January 18th, 2006, 05:52 PM

I found this on Craigslist Orlando. You decide for your self what is up with this guy.

Like making movies without all the cameras
Reply to: gigs-123019047@craigslist.org
Date: 2006-01-05, 11:26PM EST

Hi, I'm a single, white, professional male, 29, 6'3" tall, and slender/average build. I'd like to find beautiful model types interested in doing incredible sex scenes together without all the cameras or production people . I'm not camera shy, and am, in fact, an amateur photographer, so if you'd like to record the event or take some photos to fill out your portfolio, I'm down for that, too. Pay is open and negotiable: just make an offer, tell me what's included, and, if possible, send me a recent photo or two...we'll negotiate it out from there. Why not have fun and make a few bucks while doing it? Hope to talk to you soon.

January 16th, 2006, 06:20 PM	#316
Josh Bass Slash Rules! Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Houston, Texas Posts: 5,472	Kinda off topic-- How come they always say "serious applicants only". Am I going to apply as a joke (well, some of you people might)? __________________ The Bass' camerawork The Bass on IMDB

January 16th, 2006, 06:39 PM	#318
Josh Bass Slash Rules! Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Houston, Texas Posts: 5,472	Yeah, but see, if you have big serious dreams, you don't want the naive, even if they are more pliable, on your project. I dunno, I wouldn't trust someone too much that I wasn't paying unless it was a collaboration with a longtime friend. But I'd treat 'em reaaaaaaaaal good. Cause they got no reason to stay. __________________ The Bass' camerawork The Bass on IMDB

January 17th, 2006, 02:15 AM	#319
Josh Bass Slash Rules! Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Houston, Texas Posts: 5,472	I guess this isn't that crazy. . .but it's certainly ambitious for not paying-- Hey, guess who doesn't work for free? Key Grips, FX people, fight choreographers. I don't know about the rest. I guess if they'll take anyone, then no big whoop, seriously, why would anyone with enough experience to call themselves a Key grip, for instance, do this? "Reply to: aktsfilm@yahoo.com Date: 2006-01-15, 2:59AM CST Hello All, From the Flames Productions is currently in Pre-production for a 30-minute short romantic comedy that will be shot in the Austin area. We are seeking experienced crewmembers. We are in need of: Asst. fight choreographer Gaffer assistant Key grip Sound tech FX makeup artist- someone with knowledge of liquid latex, adhesives, and prosthetics. Production assistants Continuity person- some one with a very good eye for details. Craft services- someone who can assist me in the kitchen with catering meals for the cast and crew during the shoots. Cameraman who has experience with the canon XL series cameras, Wardrobe/props manager. We are also in need of a very talented seamstress, who can make custom dress for a fairy/goddess character. WE NEED still photographers who will document the production process for us. (If you respond for photographer, please attach some examples of your work. We will also need a storyboard artist (if you respond for story board artist, please attach some examples of your work, and let me know how quick you are) We are also seeking local bands that would like a chance to be featured on the soundtrack. We will consider RTF students in their Jr. and Sr. year who are looking to add to their resume. This short film will be entered into multiple film festivals in 2006 and 2007. We will be filming on WEEKENDS in February and possibly March. Please submit Resumes, Reels and Demos to aktsfilm@yahoo.com Also, if you have questions please feel free to contact me at the same email address. Compensation: A copy of the finished DVD, screen credit, credit and a listing on the website, a link to a resume or approved website, and the chance to have their talent highlighted in the film festival circuit. This film will be listed on IMDB, and will be listed with the WGA. This is a low budget short, so there will not be any monetary compensation. Take care, Robin Blesch Producer * this is in or around Austin, TX" __________________ The Bass' camerawork The Bass on IMDB

January 17th, 2006, 10:23 PM	#321
Josh Bass Slash Rules! Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Houston, Texas Posts: 5,472	If the editing paid, I'd do it. If not, then yeah, it's crap. __________________ The Bass' camerawork The Bass on IMDB

January 17th, 2006, 10:49 PM	#322
Josh Bass Slash Rules! Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Houston, Texas Posts: 5,472	Ok, I got the best one ever. "Two photographers documenting our erotic time in the homes of others - some friends, some strangers. If you'd be willing to donate your space for us to use as a set of sorts, please contact us. Your compensation is photo and video of us in your home. You can see a few of our images at flickr.com/photos/tetheredtothesun a site which will be fully updated in the next week. Plenty of personal and professional references to assure you as to the safety of your home - we'll leave it as we found it and we only need a few hours. As long as its empty - its perfect. * this is in or around Houston * no -- it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests * Compensation: Photo/Video documentation " __________________ The Bass' camerawork The Bass on IMDB

January 17th, 2006, 08:20 PM	#320
James Emory Regular Crew Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: Atlanta, Georgia Posts: 1,892	4 hours max? Well that makes me feel better. No, wait a minute, that's just for the hours of shooting not including editing. Oh, I get to do that for free? Ok, thanks! "Professional Videographer needed for an event to be held Monday Jan. 30th. Filming will last for at least 3 hours. Must be able to produce High-Quality video & also finished edited product. Digital equipment perferred be not required. Must have previous work experience (video) to submit as examples. The job pays $25 per hour with 3 hour minimum & 4 hour max. :) For more info feel free to call Xxxxxxxxxxx or respond to email below."

January 17th, 2006, 11:30 PM	#323
Josh Bass Slash Rules! Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Houston, Texas Posts: 5,472	And another, more relevant: "Need students and talent for Capitol Records shoot Reply to: gigs-126237520@craigslist.org Date: 2006-01-17, 10:03PM EST We have been asked by Capitol Records to produce a demo music video for recently signed band, Hurt. www.hurtband.com. We need talented visual artists to help us produce a worthy demo for the record label. This is a non-paying gig but if we are granted the contract we will be operating under a full scale budget. Visual FX people and makeup artists are something that we really need. Check out our affiliate at www.buzzmediaproductions.com * this is in or around NJ * no -- it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests * Compensation: Future consideration for major label projects " Damn. . .too bad those record companies are so poor and can't pay their crews. __________________ The Bass' camerawork The Bass on IMDB

January 18th, 2006, 05:54 AM	#326
Josh Bass Slash Rules! Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Houston, Texas Posts: 5,472	I don't know 'bout you, dude, but I don't seem to be able to command a whole hell of a lot for a shoot with the XL1s. So, yeah, 25 an hour ain't too bad for me. I understand if it doesn't work for you, but that's you. Keep in mind, that's $250 a day if it's a 10 hour day, and that's not a bad rate for me. __________________ The Bass' camerawork The Bass on IMDB

January 18th, 2006, 01:04 PM	#328
James Emory Regular Crew Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: Atlanta, Georgia Posts: 1,892	"Producer is looking to partner up with other Producers/Directors splitting the costs on Film/Television projects. I prefer to work with someone who has partial funds between $100,000 and $1 million and who has already selected the project to be produced. Please contact me at xxx.xxx.xxxx. Compensation: $500" Uhhh, who wouldn't? What does $500 mean for this inquiry anyway? I prefer to own a $100K Cine Alta F900 instead of a $3500 XL-1.

January 18th, 2006, 05:40 PM	#329
Josh Bass Slash Rules! Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Houston, Texas Posts: 5,472	James, I commend you for being able to get those rates for a camera alone, especiallys since most rental houses (around here, can't speak for anywhere else) only charge $175 for their DVXs). I cannot. Anyway, this one wouldn't be that notable except for the attitude: "THIS WEEKEND: Videographer/Cameraperson for MA documentary short Reply to: gigs-126419019@craigslist.org Date: 2006-01-18, 2:51PM EST THIS WEEKEND, we're shooting some B roll for a mini-documentary on a martial arts legend. This martial artist is arguably one of the best self-defense practitioners in the world, and certainly one of the most controversial. We have a Sony TRV900 (though you can use your own equipment if you prefer) and a shotgun mic. We're looking for someone to videotape during the seminar(s). Prefer a martial artist enthusiast. It will be either Saturday or Sunday (flexible), and you will be working with a director. There is no pay available. We are offering one month of quality instruction in our school, and of course you gain access to these exclusive seminars with this master--which we guarantee will not be boring. He is also one of the most charming and funny personalities you will meet. [asshole]Please don't respond if you don't have experience getting good shots as a videographer. We could ask any one of the students to hold a camera; we want someone who knows how to shoot. Please send a resume, cover letter, and if possible some links to your material.[/asshole] * There's also a brief interview with him that we're working out for Sunday, and may need minimal lights (or someone who knows how to light with practicals), so if you take an interest and want to contribute further, we would not turn you away. Thanks for looking! " My, aren't we cocky for a non-paying gig! And I like how they somehow learned the meaning of "practicals". __________________ The Bass' camerawork The Bass on IMDB

January 18th, 2006, 05:52 PM	#330
K. Forman Capt. Quirk Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Middle of the woods in Georgia Posts: 3,596	I found this on Craigslist Orlando. You decide for your self what is up with this guy. Like making movies without all the cameras Reply to: gigs-123019047@craigslist.org Date: 2006-01-05, 11:26PM EST Hi, I'm a single, white, professional male, 29, 6'3" tall, and slender/average build. I'd like to find beautiful model types interested in doing incredible sex scenes together without all the cameras or production people . I'm not camera shy, and am, in fact, an amateur photographer, so if you'd like to record the event or take some photos to fill out your portfolio, I'm down for that, too. Pay is open and negotiable: just make an offer, tell me what's included, and, if possible, send me a recent photo or two...we'll negotiate it out from there. Why not have fun and make a few bucks while doing it? Hope to talk to you soon. __________________ www.SmokeWagonLeather.us