My Entire film for you guys here.

[Bob Benkosky]

This was my first "real" movie.

It has been submitted to 3 film festivals and I'm hoping for the best because I pretty much did everything on my computer.

The only thing I didn't do was the very end shot which I grabbed from a sample someone did but he stated it was public domain, so I felt it looked cool enough to use.

I have actually redone the beginning credits a tad since this release. I added a red-ish fog and made them a bit crisper, but they were essentially the exact same.

Music was all original, shot with a GL2 in normal mode, not frame mode. One part was shot in frame mode, but it was a mistake and was very short and I couldn't go back and re-film it so I used it in frame mode but still converted it to 24p in the end.

Took about 3-4 days to film and I needed 1 reshoot. It was originally written to be longer but time contraints on the main actor made it impossible to get anymore done. It was hard enough to have gotten them to work for free, they just liked my idea enough to go with it. The actress after viewing the film was actually very surprised with the results as if I was some hack or something, haha. In her mind it was going to totally suck....so I guess it didn't in her mind, which is great for me because she's actually worked on alot higher budget stuff....compared to my NO budget movie. Anyways....it's not perfect....but I feel it's enjoyable and I learned alot doing it.

http://www.box.net/shared/static/24302dsan2.wmv

It will allow you to download it.

[Cole McDonald]

downloading...start in on the next one :) Get different actors if you can to increase the size of your available cast for future pieces :)

[Bob Benkosky]

I was lucky rnough to have gotten the main 2 because they were real actors not just friends I put in my movie. The guy already moved to hollywood to pursur a career.

[Bob Benkosky]

One guy had something to say huh.....wow. More people are interested in trailers I guess.

[Cole McDonald]

I still have to watch it, it's in my queue of things to watch...just finished making one website, have one more and 3 editing jobs to do...plus a shoot on saturday for one of the editing jobs. I promise I'll get to it and give you comments/constructive criticism.

[Phil Kay]

Well I thought it was pretty good,you've put a lot of hard work into it and I admire that. It's well shot and well directed.

Well done!

[Greg Hartzell]

Ben,

Good shooting and editing on your part. I thought it was blocked out well, but I didn't much care for the story line. I thought the actors looked like they were hired from the local gym. I didn't get why the guys shirt was off for the majority of the film and who videotaped the murder.

Was this based on a ture story?

[Bob Benkosky]

Ill answer those few questions.

Shirt off alot because he was getting out of bed alot.....hench the main storyline. This is without spoliing it for those who have not seen it.

Not everyone wears pajamas to bed, I don't. It's Florida.

His ex-girlfriend told him to get a security system, if you missed out on that, then you weren't paying attention. Which I don't blame you because people on here look more for style and less story. I am guilty of it as well. I only look at work on here to see how people shoot and compare it to my own work.

It's based on a real article I read. Not exactly 100% true, but not 100% false either.

If you weren't interested in the story, then nothing I can say about that, but it interests me. There's no defending that.

[Bruce Foreman]

I enjoyed it. The main actor was very good in his portrayal, in what looked like excellent physical condition and visually brought a lot to the role.

I felt the cinematography worked very well and everything came together.

I wish you good luck with it as a submission.

[Marcus Marchesseault]

Do you really want to know the absolute truth? I watched carefully and found some issues that got in the way of the story.

I'm not saying I can do better, but a few things bothered me.

NUMBER ONE. This is a flaw with many independent productions. Your movie is more than 10% credits. You almost lost me at the opening credits, but I assumed there would be no end credits so I kept going. When one person wears many hats on a production, we don't need to read their name with a new job title half a dozen times. Nearly eliminate the opening credits and have your total time of credits down to less than a minute.

During a very critical scene (after a girl opens the fridge and her boyfriend is standing next to her), I could see the shadow of the camera all over him. Of any time in the movie to have an error, that is the last one to let slide. That was an important moment.

Too many close shots. There were times I couldn't see what was going on because there was no medium shot. I had no idea why he was mad toward the beginning and didn't realize his place was trashed until halfway through the scene. Show the trash so the audience knows why he is acting that way.

Show the security camera being installed or tweaked. You could even add that now without the actors. A cutaway to the camera itself at the right moment will establish it's existence. Yes, it was established in a flashback, but it seems like it needs to be oriented as to when it was installed.

Tone down the music in scenes that don't need tension. It dulls the music when it is on eleven all the time. Bring up the tension only where appropriate. Also, the music is almost totally in the left channel.

It was generally too dark. That's okay for some scenes, but some accent lighting to outline objects would be nice. Use backlight/kickers to illuminate dark scenes a bit so the frame isn't just a bunch of black all the time. It's okay sometimes, but remember that even though night is all dark in the real world - movies need to have things on the screen for the audience to look at.

There is a scene where the couple is in bed that looks like a POV from a third party. I thought someone was in the room with them because of the way the camera moved. Handheld is fine sometimes, but it can imply that it is another entity and not just a passive observer depending on how and when it is used.

These are mostly things you can adjust now in post. Often, it is best to leave things alone and move on to another project, but I would like to see this one fixed. As a first effort, it really isn't bad, but the little things added up.

You used a real person's name in an explanation in the end. You might want to consider adding that this is a "dramatization" or something to cover yourself legally. I don't know about legal stuff, but that sort of stuck out at me.

[Nic Smith]

Just to add to the above comment, I think the one thing that brings the whole thing down is the audio. It's very obviously straight into the on-camera mic, which makes the levels change depending on where the camera is. Also, there is some noticeable echo in some scenes, which is really off-putting. The scene with the phone call had the dialogue changing levels as soon as the scene cut. It should go a bit quieter, but not as quiet as it did, it was too abrupt.

Lighting and cinematography tend to come second to good audio. If you can get a boom mic in there and shoot the scene a couple of times for each actor's dialogue, it will make your production 50 times more professional.

Also, the use of handheld camera was not a good move in my view. The GL2 is a very light camera and in my experience you can only get a decent handheld shot from something heavier like an XL2. The shots are not "heavy" enough, they jump around more than a professional hand held would. I would suggest using a fluid head tripod (or even any tripod) to get a much more professional look. Unless you have a heavier camera (or a stabiliser) I would stear clear of handheld.

But anyway, thats all only in my opinion. It was a fairly decent script. Just a few major things let it down for me. Hope this helps.

[Bob Benkosky]

Well, I don't see a camera shadow when he's next to her....but whatever on that part. It gets slightly dark when I moved in, but it's not obviously a camera shadow, but more of my shadow.

The audio is mixed excellent in 5.1 and if you are listening to it on anything else it won't sound right.

All vocals are in center.
Ambient effects are all around in some parts.
Music is mainly in the front 2 with some in the rear.

I mixed it and re-mixed it many times and trust me, it cannot be done better.

Personally, if you don't like the style, that's totally cool with me. I am who I am. That's my style.

If you're going to complain about a POV that confused you....certainly it wasn't meant to trick you. I'm not using that to give a generic sense of "someone is in the room". That's your interpretation of it, not mine.

Every movie out there is cameramen behind cameras. We all know it.
I try to give the movie some style because here at this dvinfo.net we are all just filmmakers or wanna be filmmakers. Mostly everyone's got something, some don't.

I don't complain about someone's style unless it looks like "video" 75% of people's stuff on here doesn't exactly look that great, but I can't make that judgement realistically just because I don't agree with his shot selection.

To tell me I need to add a scene of a video system is plain ridiculous. It was mentioned, it's important, but not the main story that's going on. Also, I've gotten insane compliments on how I did the phone scene, so I don't agree. It was also done completely different than what was originally there and was VERY difficult to work on.

Also...don't forget.....1 person did everything, me. I had to learn alot.
No one could help me figure out anything. I was on my own for the first time, and I've been told it's crazy good for how many people were involved.

You don't think that I wanted to go back and change stuff, add stuff....who doesn't.

It's done! Nothing more I can do about it.

I had 3 or 4 days to film.....and had to take the good, with the bad, and for as many movies as I've seen.....I'd say it turned out far better than it should have. I've never, ever worked with strangers before or edited a 20 min film. I've only messed around with skits and small 12 min movies back in the 90's editing with VHS.

Just be realistic when criticising others work.

All I know, is if it wasn't mine.....and I knew it was 1 guy....I'd just say kudos, good job...I'm sure you would have done certain things over, or made changes here and there but you couldn't. Be happy you got it done.

I know some people are going to like or dislike it anyways.....I'd rather just take a , "I didn't like it"

Oh well.....that is my 2 cents.

[Mike Horrigan]

Bob, first you posted this...

Originally Posted by Bob Benkosky

One guy had something to say huh.....wow. More people are interested in trailers I guess.

And when you got a few lengthy critiques you posted this...

Originally Posted by Bob Benkosky

I know some people are going to like or dislike it anyways.....I'd rather just take a , "I didn't like it".

I thought is was "OK"

I was going to post more but I'm not sure how you would take it.
Criticism is tough to handle, but it has helped me improve on my work.

There were things that I liked about your work as well.

Cheers,

Mike

[Bob Benkosky]

Now that I think about it......most people on these boards just say things differently than with my film.

Just for example....if someone's work is just plain terrible, they will be really nice and just give him what he did right, not really what he did wrong so much.

I guess I was just expecting people to say what they liked about it and I myself could just go from there.

If someone's going to complain , say about my music....well..... I did what I like and you know I'm not going to re-score the entire movie, so it's just a waste to say anything about that.

But.... If you said hey, I liked the credits graphics.....or you liked the pace of the flick....then at least I'd take something positive away from it. To rip someone a new one about their movie, it just wastes your time as well as mine. I didn't have a boom guy.....so no....I couldn't use a boom pole.... Of course I wanted too. I know ya get my drift now. The last post was right on the money. Thought it was ok. Some have not liked the story and liked the filming.... That's fine too. I know the story wasn't fleshed out enough, but I just had no choice. The actor left the state and never came back.

[Mike Horrigan]

Bob, it sounds like all you want to hear is compliments?

If that's the case, run it by your family and I'm sure you will get plenty.

I don't think anyone here has it out for you, you also don't HAVE to agree with everything said.

That said, you should take some of the negative comments and try to improve on them so those things can't be said about your next movie.

The sound was off in spots, especially the voices. I know you worked hard on the mix, but there is room for improvement next time.

My work quite frankly is beneath yours, but I still listen to the criticisms and try to get better with every one.

Cheers,

Mike