"The Date"

Raji Barbir · March 25th, 2006, 10:54 PM

ok, the reason i'm sharing this is because i'm still happy with the way the script originally was. Video and sound don't look or sound good, but i still laugh everytime i watch this little film. It's 9.4 megs in size and 4:30 minutes long.

http://film.tinycomet.com/films/thedate.wmv

i've wanted to post a .mov version but still can't get quicktime to cooperate with me... maybe when i can get quicktime to work with me, i'll post that too.

Ash Greyson · March 26th, 2006, 07:01 PM

Anyone who gets something complete deserves a pat on the back... that being said... I thought it was pretty unoriginal, I love fart jokes as much as the next guy but I didnt think this was funny at all...

ash =o)

Glenn Davidson · March 26th, 2006, 07:17 PM

It Stinks.

Raji Barbir · March 26th, 2006, 10:48 PM

lol

damn that's harsh!! I have to say i'm having a hard time understanding why it's so bad... i mean i knew it was bad... but i didn't think people would think it was THAT bad!!... i know all of the 12 million faults this thing has. Lack of continuity, poor lighting, poor audio, not the best acting, strange cuts because of where the characters are between the cuts, etc.

i don't know. I'd appreciate some constructive critiques more than anything else. If it sucks that bad, fine, but point out what you hated about it so i can fix it next time around. Unoriginal? Uh... a fart joke is a fart joke... how could it be original? Maybe that's the problem.

I shot this so i could see all the mistakes i'd make before i shot the films i really want to look good. And no, i don't have anymore fart-related stories and i don't expect my next movie to look like gold either.

Either way, thanks for the replies.

Nick Weeks · March 26th, 2006, 10:59 PM

a fart joke's a a fart joke's a fart joke...

although I thought it was pretty funny. good editing. My opinion might not count because of a small amount of innhebriation., but I enjoyed it!!!

Glenn Davidson · March 27th, 2006, 01:31 AM

Ok...4.5 minutes is waaay too long for this. Budwiser did their farting horses in 30 seconds. Really, I thought it was painful to watch. I hung in there for a surprise ending that never came. The girl passing out was just not enough. Just cut 4 minutes and you be fine.

Ash Greyson · March 27th, 2006, 04:14 PM

Well, I have seen a million date movies, most involve farting, nothing original about either. Actually the only remotely original line was the guy blaming it on his shoes... the waking up, the date almost there, the getting ready... all one big cliche... The editing was pretty decent though... keep at it!

ash =o)

Andy Graham · March 27th, 2006, 05:12 PM

I'll throw in some constructive criticism that may help you next time.....with regards to your editing IMO you over cut it. For example In the scene where they move from the door to the living room I counted four cuts, I would have cut that in no more than two shots.....if you start to notice the edits then they are wrong, a good edit is never seen and when you over cut something it draws the audiences attention to the edit.

But keep at it.

Andy.

Matthew Overstreet · March 27th, 2006, 06:46 PM

I'd have to agree with both the person who said you over-cut as well as the person who said this was too long.

I think a lot of amateur film directors or editors (whatever you want to call them) shoot for too long a length without enough content. It's not good to overstretch a concept. It took me two years to figure that out.

Regarding the cuts. I like to think that if you take a still from each of your shots and lay them out, they should work in a similar way that a comic does (with the exception that video moves, and because of that, can become a lot more dynamic). I think you really begin to notice a lot about your shorts when you do that and you may start finding shots that you can . . . cut altogether.

Matt

Raji Barbir · March 28th, 2006, 01:07 AM

thanks guys, this helps a lot more.

I thought about this a lot and remembered something that had bothered me when reading over the script, weeks after it had been finalized: I remember thinking "where's the hook? Where's the event that really throws the characters and the story off balance? Where's the opposition?". I foolishly chose to ignore this and i didn't think of it until after i realized nobody liked the film except my family, who is required by law to be biased about everything i do. hehe

but the critiques are very useful to me, so thanks again guys!

Glenn Davidson · March 28th, 2006, 01:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Raji Barbir

i realized nobody liked the film except my family,

Actually, the intoxicated guy from Alabama seemed to enjoy it.

Nick Weeks · March 28th, 2006, 10:10 PM

haha, I thought it was funny... but, watching it again, it did seem kinda flat. At first I didn't notice the over-edited scenes (for obvious reasons), but now that I watch it again, it does seem to cut around a lot.

Chris Harris · April 2nd, 2006, 04:49 PM

Was I the only one who noticed that the girl knew exactly where the TV was, when she'd never been in the house before?

Raji Barbir · April 2nd, 2006, 06:18 PM

haha didn't think of that... but yeah. You'll also notice that when they first meet, Todd says "come in! come in!", but she's already let herself in. There's plenty of little flaws like that. :D

Eniola Akintoye · April 3rd, 2006, 04:06 PM

What camera did you use for shooting?

March 25th, 2006, 10:54 PM	#1
Raji Barbir Regular Crew Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Salt Lake City, UT Posts: 97	"The Date" - my first movie! ok, the reason i'm sharing this is because i'm still happy with the way the script originally was. Video and sound don't look or sound good, but i still laugh everytime i watch this little film. It's 9.4 megs in size and 4:30 minutes long. http://film.tinycomet.com/films/thedate.wmv i've wanted to post a .mov version but still can't get quicktime to cooperate with me... maybe when i can get quicktime to work with me, i'll post that too. Last edited by Raji Barbir; March 26th, 2006 at 11:18 AM.

March 27th, 2006, 05:12 PM	#8
Andy Graham Major Player Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Lanark,Scotland Posts: 736	I'll throw in some constructive criticism that may help you next time.....with regards to your editing IMO you over cut it. For example In the scene where they move from the door to the living room I counted four cuts, I would have cut that in no more than two shots.....if you start to notice the edits then they are wrong, a good edit is never seen and when you over cut something it draws the audiences attention to the edit. But keep at it. Andy. __________________ Actor: "where would that light be coming from?" DP: "same place as the music" -Andrew Lesnie-

March 26th, 2006, 07:01 PM	#2
Ash Greyson Trustee Join Date: May 2003 Location: Tulsa, OK Posts: 1,689	Anyone who gets something complete deserves a pat on the back... that being said... I thought it was pretty unoriginal, I love fart jokes as much as the next guy but I didnt think this was funny at all... ash =o)

March 26th, 2006, 07:17 PM	#3
Glenn Davidson Major Player Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Nevada City, California Posts: 499	It Stinks.

March 26th, 2006, 10:48 PM	#4
Raji Barbir Regular Crew Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Salt Lake City, UT Posts: 97	lol damn that's harsh!! I have to say i'm having a hard time understanding why it's so bad... i mean i knew it was bad... but i didn't think people would think it was THAT bad!!... i know all of the 12 million faults this thing has. Lack of continuity, poor lighting, poor audio, not the best acting, strange cuts because of where the characters are between the cuts, etc. i don't know. I'd appreciate some constructive critiques more than anything else. If it sucks that bad, fine, but point out what you hated about it so i can fix it next time around. Unoriginal? Uh... a fart joke is a fart joke... how could it be original? Maybe that's the problem. I shot this so i could see all the mistakes i'd make before i shot the films i really want to look good. And no, i don't have anymore fart-related stories and i don't expect my next movie to look like gold either. Either way, thanks for the replies.

March 26th, 2006, 10:59 PM	#5
Nick Weeks Major Player Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Birmingham, AL USA Posts: 722	a fart joke's a a fart joke's a fart joke... although I thought it was pretty funny. good editing. My opinion might not count because of a small amount of innhebriation., but I enjoyed it!!!

March 27th, 2006, 01:31 AM	#6
Glenn Davidson Major Player Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Nevada City, California Posts: 499	Ok...4.5 minutes is waaay too long for this. Budwiser did their farting horses in 30 seconds. Really, I thought it was painful to watch. I hung in there for a surprise ending that never came. The girl passing out was just not enough. Just cut 4 minutes and you be fine.

March 27th, 2006, 04:14 PM	#7
Ash Greyson Trustee Join Date: May 2003 Location: Tulsa, OK Posts: 1,689	Well, I have seen a million date movies, most involve farting, nothing original about either. Actually the only remotely original line was the guy blaming it on his shoes... the waking up, the date almost there, the getting ready... all one big cliche... The editing was pretty decent though... keep at it! ash =o)

March 27th, 2006, 06:46 PM	#9
Matthew Overstreet Regular Crew Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Whitman, Massachusetts Posts: 168	I'd have to agree with both the person who said you over-cut as well as the person who said this was too long. I think a lot of amateur film directors or editors (whatever you want to call them) shoot for too long a length without enough content. It's not good to overstretch a concept. It took me two years to figure that out. Regarding the cuts. I like to think that if you take a still from each of your shots and lay them out, they should work in a similar way that a comic does (with the exception that video moves, and because of that, can become a lot more dynamic). I think you really begin to notice a lot about your shorts when you do that and you may start finding shots that you can . . . cut altogether. Matt

March 28th, 2006, 01:07 AM	#10
Raji Barbir Regular Crew Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Salt Lake City, UT Posts: 97	thanks guys, this helps a lot more. I thought about this a lot and remembered something that had bothered me when reading over the script, weeks after it had been finalized: I remember thinking "where's the hook? Where's the event that really throws the characters and the story off balance? Where's the opposition?". I foolishly chose to ignore this and i didn't think of it until after i realized nobody liked the film except my family, who is required by law to be biased about everything i do. hehe but the critiques are very useful to me, so thanks again guys!

March 28th, 2006, 10:10 PM	#12
Nick Weeks Major Player Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Birmingham, AL USA Posts: 722	haha, I thought it was funny... but, watching it again, it did seem kinda flat. At first I didn't notice the over-edited scenes (for obvious reasons), but now that I watch it again, it does seem to cut around a lot.

April 2nd, 2006, 04:49 PM	#13
Chris Harris Major Player Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: San Francisco, California Posts: 487	Was I the only one who noticed that the girl knew exactly where the TV was, when she'd never been in the house before?

April 2nd, 2006, 06:18 PM	#14
Raji Barbir Regular Crew Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Salt Lake City, UT Posts: 97	haha didn't think of that... but yeah. You'll also notice that when they first meet, Todd says "come in! come in!", but she's already let herself in. There's plenty of little flaws like that. :D

April 3rd, 2006, 04:06 PM	#15
Eniola Akintoye Major Player Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Duluth GA Posts: 238	What camera did you use for shooting?