Assassin...Check it Out!!!

[Ibrahim Hodroj]

A short clip i made.. it's to show my editing and vfx skills! just watch it and tell me guys what u think!

Feedback is really appreciated

Video: http://www.vimeo.com/743882

[Zan Shin]

perhaps next video features suicide

[Alex Sprinkle]

A few thoughts I had while watching:

"Assassin is spelled wrong in the title"

"Instead of receiving the message, it looks like you were sending one. If you weren't, then why does it say 'Send' at the bottom?"

"Looks like he could have a lot of neighbors in that building, how did he know which one?"

"I like that the gun isn't just 'there'. It's built from a case. I like that."

"Isn't that an automatic? How did it fire one shot?"

"Why is his target a kid?"

"The handheld scope is zooming in like a camera on a tripod. Maybe the show could be handheld, since he's obviously not going to hold it so smooth without is resting on something. Also, consider a 'zooming' twist on the scope. He's just looking through the scope, and it's zooming for him."

[Ken Bates]

CRAP !
I am serioulsy in pre-production of something very similar...

Nice work
I think you did a great job in post esp. It seemd to flow well. That feel is hard to capture sometimes and you pretty much nailed it with the rather quick editing cuts etc.
Music choice seemed a little "rushed" for the more methodical and deliberate action that went with it.
Ideas/suggestions.
The "assignment' message was a bit to, i don't know, common or easy. Maybe have the address instead only and the assasin thinks for a min and looks at his own mail and sees the addy as 1 number different. (gasp..the target is NEXT DOOR ! !)
A little surprise humor would be good, the assasin could be reading "Hit man Monthly" when he gets the call
The light behind his head when he reads the mesage is a bit distracting.
It kind of looks like he is a bout to shoot his own toe off the way he sits and aims. I honestly thought it was going to be that kind of surprise joke at the end.
I like how you can see his eye in the glass of the scope.
He doesn't seem to have a very steady hand aiming. Maybe he is new and thats why he has a kid as a target for hist first job. :)
Just my ideas and observations. Nice work though. Like I said, it has a nice finished slick feel.

[Ibrahim Hodroj]

Thanks Ken Bates...i welcome critiscism alot...thanks for ur tips!!
maybe i'll try them the next time i do....Assassin 2 or something!!

[Henry Dale]

Nice one. I liked the pace, the cutting, and the colour.

A few niggles: for that particular shot, I think a sniper would use a longer-barreled weapon, he'd use a support (the railing for example) to improve the probablility of a kill, he wouldn't use a zoom telescopic sight, he'd definitely move as soon as he'd taken the shot, and he'd probably have had a good wipe around with some Clearasil before featuring in his own snuff video.

[Andy Graham]

I think people are loosing perspective, he's simply showcasing his editing vfx skills, your on the right path.....my advice is if it feels right go with it.

BTW there are four main ways to assassinate someone, rifle, pistol, knife or bomb, if its a rifle you have to get specially made sub sonic rounds for weapons like m16's or in this case a dodgy version of a heckler and koch because you can't silence a super sonic round like the regular 556 cal or 762 cal. And just for the record the normal sound effect they use in hollywood for a silenced weapon is no where near close, in reality it sounds like a loud click because your mainly hearing the hammer hit the firing pin

If its a pistol a professional would use a revolver because unlike semi automatics like beretta's or glocks revolvers never jam and they don't eject a shell for some dumb cop to find.

As for a knife any old thing will do however any special forces issue would be best.

If its a bomb sometimes the simplest thing is the most effective thing...however im not going to tell you how to make a bomb cause its irresponsible and id probably get kicked off this site....all im doing is giving you more acurate advice on how to make your film more realistic

And Alex.... most automatic rifles like this have a choice of semi automatic or fully automatic.

And if your using prop weapons in a public place always contact the local authorities and inform them or there may be some unfortunate misunderstandings (believe me they happen).

Andy.

[Bryan Gilchrist]

Pretty good..

I would have opted for something besides a sub-machine gun. Don't know many assassins that use sub-machine guns. They generally - in this case - use long-range rifles and some kind of silencer. The gun he had seemed a bit small for assassin work, too. And most scopes like that generally don't zoom in.

Additionally, with all of the school shootings and the touchiness of the subject, I would have opted for shooting someone besides a kid doing his homework, unless, of course, if this guy was some raging lunatic wanting to take out school kids.

The VFX were ok. Not many shots involved in regards to the VFX except for the message on the phone, the shot from the gun, the blood, and the cross hairs.

The text of the two messages on the phone don't match. And, not to get too picky, but messages to "take out" someone can be traced back to the sender and receiver.

The shot from the gun was ok.

The blood was a little too red.

And the cross hairs were a little too thick. Furthermore, as mentioned earlier, most scopes like the one that's on that gun don't zoom.

The editing was good, though. Shots matched pretty well.

[Damian Clarke]

LOL! That really tickled me.
I can't do effects work so don't take me too seriously, but it made me burst out laughing when the kids head got hit so comically especially as it had been so heavily dramatised with the music build-up.
I think all the technical stuff has already been mentioned.
Another one!

[Julian Shapiro]

Here's what I want to know: who did the amazing score?

[Andrew Slankard]

Ya did a good job there Ibrahim, though I agree with Ken on one issue: music. Although that may not have been the focus of the short, it's still a big factor to consider. "Rushed" is a good way to describe it, it's tempo is a little too quick and intense for simply assembling a rifle. Maybe in a future situation similar to this one use something that starts soft and builds to the climax of the shot.

I was impressed with the visual effects, that was a pretty darn good muzzle flash and bullet impact. What did you use to do all that?

Julian - the score is from the Transformers soundtrack by Steve Jablonsky.

Good work man, keep it up! :)

[John C. Plunkett]

It looks like you have some work to do on that muzzle flash. The first shot of the phone didn't match the shot with the message and the scope view detracted from the feeling of the rest of the piece. However I couldn't help laughing at the laid-back assassin.