DVC 5 Feedback

Robert Martens · April 13th, 2006, 01:16 PM

So I'm a couple hours late to the party. I had an appointment to get my teeth cleaned, sue me.

While I go watch the other three films released so far (and provide what feedback I can), I'm anxious to collect everyone's thoughts on my little movie. Good? Bad? Ugly?

Edward Slonaker · April 13th, 2006, 01:30 PM

Good movie, Robert. I'm having a tough time figuring out the last scene. What's the reflection of in the van windows? I related to the story real well. Mothers....whaddaya gonna do? Anyway, nice job.

Geez, I've seen the first four entries and already I feel like they are four better (and FAR better) than mine! Very impressive, indeed.

Scott Cozad · April 13th, 2006, 01:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Edward Slonaker

Geez, I've seen the first four entries and already I feel like they are four better (and FAR better) than mine! Very impressive, indeed.

That's my feeling. My skill level is no where near what has been displayed so far. School is in session for me and my little film.

Robert Martens · April 13th, 2006, 01:37 PM

Yeah, the few people who've seen it have all said the same thing, that the last shot doesn't work. Glad to see someone actually noticed the reflection of anything in the van window, however; most people don't even see it. I can't tell you what it is without spoiling the film here, suffice it to say it apparently changes the meaning of the whole thing once you see it. I'm told if you pause the video you can make it out, maybe give that a shot.

The angle is bad, and the whole idea may just be far too dramatic and gimmicky for someone at my level of experience, or lack thereof. But hey, that's what these contests are for. I'll do a better job next time, with any luck.

Bradley L Marlow · April 13th, 2006, 01:44 PM

Hi Robert -

This was a nice film! A mother passing away and the son has big time regrets? Oh yeah! Strikes a cord with me.

Your lighting set up for the family was excellent. It looks as though you mixed natural and studio light brilliantly. Well done.

Wasn't sure what the main character was looking at all that time. Was there a reflection in the van window? Or was this guy having an internal debate about going into a hospital/morgue to identify his mother's body with his dad? And in the end, elected not to go in.

Nice one

PS: I just had my teeth cleaned too. How bizarre! :)

Best wishes~
Bradley

Chris Barcellos · April 13th, 2006, 01:50 PM

I thought I saw something else in the window. I'll have to go back and look at it again. Hey, maybe thats another good thing about the film, it means different things to different people.

Philip Gioja · April 13th, 2006, 01:52 PM

I was wondering about that -- I replayed that last shot several times when I watched it, but I'm still not sure I know what to look for. I see a tree and the building behind the van, and maybe something in the tree, but couldn't really make it out. Maybe it's because I downloaded the low-res version?

Robert Martens · April 13th, 2006, 01:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bradley L Marlow

Your lighting set up for the family was excellent. It looks as though you mixed natural and studio light brilliantly. Well done.

Heh heh...funny you mention that, 'cause the stained glass light hanging over the table is the only light I used, aside from the daylight coming through the door behind us. Shot that scene immediately after the shots during breakfast, with only a quick costume change and a white blanket stapled (yes, stapled) to the wall over the sliding glass door. Plus that wicker-lookin' divider thingie. Helped make the birthday scene look like it took place later in the day, I think.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bradley L Marlow

Was there a reflection in the van window?

Yep, that's right! It's not as bright or obvious as I'd hoped, but it's there, and it's visible if you look for it. Of course, one shouldn't have to sit with his audience and explain this stuff after the film's over, so I'm guessing it wasn't a very good idea.

Thanks for the reply, I'll be over to your thread in a few minutes!

Chris Barcellos · April 13th, 2006, 01:56 PM

Okay, what I thought was there, was there, and I think I understand what was being contemplated at the van, with all the flashbacks having come before. Right ? I think it did work okay. I don't want to give it away, but I thought it was pretty clear the first time through...

Robert Martens · April 13th, 2006, 01:58 PM

That's absolutely right, Chris, I am indeed thinking what you think I'm thinking.

Bradley L Marlow · April 13th, 2006, 02:02 PM

Aha! I saw it Robert.

No need to say it wasn't a good idea. It was! All it needs is a new shot with the van windows and the reflection within-moving slowly by. Maybe the footage could be slowed down to 30-50% motion speed?

The fact that the main character was contemplating something came through very clear! And yes- your parents did a wonderful job!

Best wishes~
Bradley

Meryem Ersoz · April 13th, 2006, 02:07 PM

it's a huge challenge you put before yourself, to do a dramatic film in five minutes. huge. action-adventure yes, humor yes. these lend themselves more easily to a short subject. but to take on someone's regrets over the loss of a parent in five (5!) minutes--to review a life, that's something. to try to do something profound with an ultra-short, you should be commended.

i know from the previous threads how you sweated this one, and now i understand why. i think it came together pretty well (though i will have to go back for another look at the reflection in the van, too).

your parents are pretty darn good actors, for parents....i could never have coaxed such convincing performances out of my own, god rest their souls. i was pretty moved just by the fact that you took this on....

Robert Martens · April 13th, 2006, 02:30 PM

Yes, Meryem, they did a wonderful job, and I thank you on their behalf (I'll pass your compliment along). Little in the way of acting in this film, however, as what you saw was pretty much the real deal. That conversation about the coat is one my mother and I have every winter.

A bit of trivia about the last scene with my mother, she thought the "useless emotion" line was completely unnatural, and began laughing a matter of frames after placing her hand on my shoulder in that take. I think it sounds fine, and she did well for herself.

It's really amazing what the camera does to the acting, though; every take I thought sounded ridiculous on "location" sounded perfectly natural in post, while some of the so-called "good" stuff was loaded with cheese.

Hugo Pinto · April 13th, 2006, 02:30 PM

Robert,

Initially, I though it looked good, but didn't quite get the meaning.

After a second viewing, and a still on the last shot, the whole thing got an extra positive note in my head. The concept looks darn good, the lighting inhouse looks great, and contrats to your parents!

Maybe if the van would move a bit slower in the last scene, or if the object was more vivid, it would have been more obvious. But, then again, is obviousness the goal in cinema?

Best

Hugo

Robert Martens · April 13th, 2006, 02:33 PM

Hugo, I'm with you on that point, but that van's got some transmission, lemme tell ya. I get in, start it up, throw it in Drive, and away we go! To go any slower than I did would require braking, which to me would seem out of place. I've just decided to leave, if you see my brake lights it might seem disorienting--"Did he change his mind AGAIN? What's happening?"

I'm thinking up ways around it, though, in case the occasion ever calls to reshoot that scene. Maybe push/pull it with another vehicle, that might help sell the effect of driving away slowly.

April 13th, 2006, 01:16 PM	#1
Robert Martens Major Player Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Miller Place, NY Posts: 820	DVC 5 Feedback - No Other So I'm a couple hours late to the party. I had an appointment to get my teeth cleaned, sue me. While I go watch the other three films released so far (and provide what feedback I can), I'm anxious to collect everyone's thoughts on my little movie. Good? Bad? Ugly?

April 13th, 2006, 01:30 PM	#2
Edward Slonaker Major Player Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Hell's 6 acres in S. Texas Posts: 203	Good movie, Robert. I'm having a tough time figuring out the last scene. What's the reflection of in the van windows? I related to the story real well. Mothers....whaddaya gonna do? Anyway, nice job. Geez, I've seen the first four entries and already I feel like they are four better (and FAR better) than mine! Very impressive, indeed. __________________ Edward Slonaker El Pilon Productions San Patricio, Texas www.elpilon.com

April 13th, 2006, 01:50 PM	#6
Chris Barcellos Inner Circle Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Elk Grove CA Posts: 6,838	I thought I saw something else in the window. I'll have to go back and look at it again. Hey, maybe thats another good thing about the film, it means different things to different people. __________________ Chris J. Barcellos

April 13th, 2006, 01:56 PM	#9
Chris Barcellos Inner Circle Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Elk Grove CA Posts: 6,838	Okay, what I thought was there, was there, and I think I understand what was being contemplated at the van, with all the flashbacks having come before. Right ? I think it did work okay. I don't want to give it away, but I thought it was pretty clear the first time through... __________________ Chris J. Barcellos

April 13th, 2006, 02:02 PM	#11
Bradley L Marlow Major Player Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Central Wyoming Posts: 484	Aha! I saw it Robert. No need to say it wasn't a good idea. It was! All it needs is a new shot with the van windows and the reflection within-moving slowly by. Maybe the footage could be slowed down to 30-50% motion speed? The fact that the main character was contemplating something came through very clear! And yes- your parents did a wonderful job! Best wishes~ Bradley Last edited by Bradley L Marlow; April 13th, 2006 at 03:20 PM.

April 13th, 2006, 01:37 PM	#4
Robert Martens Major Player Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Miller Place, NY Posts: 820	Yeah, the few people who've seen it have all said the same thing, that the last shot doesn't work. Glad to see someone actually noticed the reflection of anything in the van window, however; most people don't even see it. I can't tell you what it is without spoiling the film here, suffice it to say it apparently changes the meaning of the whole thing once you see it. I'm told if you pause the video you can make it out, maybe give that a shot. The angle is bad, and the whole idea may just be far too dramatic and gimmicky for someone at my level of experience, or lack thereof. But hey, that's what these contests are for. I'll do a better job next time, with any luck.

April 13th, 2006, 01:44 PM	#5
Bradley L Marlow Major Player Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Central Wyoming Posts: 484	Hi Robert - This was a nice film! A mother passing away and the son has big time regrets? Oh yeah! Strikes a cord with me. Your lighting set up for the family was excellent. It looks as though you mixed natural and studio light brilliantly. Well done. Wasn't sure what the main character was looking at all that time. Was there a reflection in the van window? Or was this guy having an internal debate about going into a hospital/morgue to identify his mother's body with his dad? And in the end, elected not to go in. Nice one PS: I just had my teeth cleaned too. How bizarre! :) Best wishes~ Bradley

April 13th, 2006, 01:52 PM	#7
Philip Gioja Major Player Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Piper City, IL Posts: 350	I was wondering about that -- I replayed that last shot several times when I watched it, but I'm still not sure I know what to look for. I see a tree and the building behind the van, and maybe something in the tree, but couldn't really make it out. Maybe it's because I downloaded the low-res version?

April 13th, 2006, 01:58 PM	#10
Robert Martens Major Player Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Miller Place, NY Posts: 820	That's absolutely right, Chris, I am indeed thinking what you think I'm thinking.

April 13th, 2006, 02:07 PM	#12
Meryem Ersoz Wrangler Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Boulder, CO Posts: 3,015	it's a huge challenge you put before yourself, to do a dramatic film in five minutes. huge. action-adventure yes, humor yes. these lend themselves more easily to a short subject. but to take on someone's regrets over the loss of a parent in five (5!) minutes--to review a life, that's something. to try to do something profound with an ultra-short, you should be commended. i know from the previous threads how you sweated this one, and now i understand why. i think it came together pretty well (though i will have to go back for another look at the reflection in the van, too). your parents are pretty darn good actors, for parents....i could never have coaxed such convincing performances out of my own, god rest their souls. i was pretty moved just by the fact that you took this on....

April 13th, 2006, 02:30 PM	#13
Robert Martens Major Player Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Miller Place, NY Posts: 820	Yes, Meryem, they did a wonderful job, and I thank you on their behalf (I'll pass your compliment along). Little in the way of acting in this film, however, as what you saw was pretty much the real deal. That conversation about the coat is one my mother and I have every winter. A bit of trivia about the last scene with my mother, she thought the "useless emotion" line was completely unnatural, and began laughing a matter of frames after placing her hand on my shoulder in that take. I think it sounds fine, and she did well for herself. It's really amazing what the camera does to the acting, though; every take I thought sounded ridiculous on "location" sounded perfectly natural in post, while some of the so-called "good" stuff was loaded with cheese.

April 13th, 2006, 02:30 PM	#14
Hugo Pinto Regular Crew Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Lisbon, Portugal Posts: 92	Robert, Initially, I though it looked good, but didn't quite get the meaning. After a second viewing, and a still on the last shot, the whole thing got an extra positive note in my head. The concept looks darn good, the lighting inhouse looks great, and contrats to your parents! Maybe if the van would move a bit slower in the last scene, or if the object was more vivid, it would have been more obvious. But, then again, is obviousness the goal in cinema? Best Hugo

April 13th, 2006, 02:33 PM	#15
Robert Martens Major Player Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Miller Place, NY Posts: 820	Hugo, I'm with you on that point, but that van's got some transmission, lemme tell ya. I get in, start it up, throw it in Drive, and away we go! To go any slower than I did would require braking, which to me would seem out of place. I've just decided to leave, if you see my brake lights it might seem disorienting--"Did he change his mind AGAIN? What's happening?" I'm thinking up ways around it, though, in case the occasion ever calls to reshoot that scene. Maybe push/pull it with another vehicle, that might help sell the effect of driving away slowly.