Dvc12

Tor-Atle Kindsbekken · March 13th, 2008, 11:49 PM

Waaaaaa... sorry... I didn't see the "DVC Feedback" section until now. I should ofcource have posted this thread sunday... Sorry... I'm new to this... both this forum and film making is new to me... so bare with me ;-)

My first DV Challenge entry is out... and this is the second short film I ever make.
Please give me some feedback.
Any criticism is welcome ;-)

Tor-Atle Kindsbekken
“Avancego” (Breakthrough)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w-gMTGgLb9s

You can also watch it in high quality at:
http://www.hysteriah.no/kunst.htm

Robert Martens · March 14th, 2008, 12:03 AM

This movie gives me goosebumps all over, and that's a good sign. I've watched it three times now, cranking my speakers' volume higher each time.

My only criticism would be to move closer to the audience, to perhaps try and fill in that empty gray space at the bottom of the frame when we see them. Maybe set the camera to the right (their right, that is, but screen left), while still remaining in front of them, to have their gaze directed to our right? That's where I imagined the performer during this, so having them looking in that direction works better in my mind.

Beyond that, I have no comments of substance. I must ask, do you know where someone in the United States might purchase a copy of that CD? I can read the text on the cover in the high resolution video you have on your site, but honestly I'm still not sure what album title I should be searching for.

Alex Chamberlain · March 14th, 2008, 12:12 AM

This was really a beautiful piece. I thoroughly enjoyed every technical and emotional aspect of it. It looked professional through and through and I just want to congratulate you on pulling it off. The only spot where my mind took a tiny step back and disconnected from the film a bit is where the camera zooms into the angel's face after the audience disappears. The start of the zoom was a bit shaky, especially compared to the super-smooth tracking shots at the beginning of the film. I suppose it's possible that you went for that look on purpose, but my mind still wanted smooth motion there to stay involved. Anyway, that's just a tiny detail in a piece that I thought was otherwise flawless. Amazingly well done.

Tor-Atle Kindsbekken · March 14th, 2008, 01:39 AM

Thanks for the feedback, guys :-)

Robert Martens: Great advice! Thanks :-)))
Actually I don't know if the CD is for sale outside europe... but I guess not since the lyrics are in norwegian. But I'm not sure... I guess you can email Martin himself and ask him... or maybe you can order the CD directly from him. His email is mkart4sale@hotmail.com. ;-)

Alex Chamberlain: Thank you so much! :-)))
About the zoom scene at the end: This was a combination of the look I was after... AND a terrible bad (and cheap) dolly that I was using ;-) Because of the effect with the audience disapearing, I couldn't change the image and use the Image stabilizer on that shot like I did with the others ;-) But I was aware of this when shooting... and thought it would be a "cool effect" with shaky camera movement at the end... a littlebit like the "Moulin Rouge effect", you know? ;-) But maybe you're rignt that it would've been better with smooth camera movement in this scene as the rest of the film ;-)

Dick Mays · March 15th, 2008, 09:41 AM

Beautiful Piece. Very Professional look. Some great shallow depth of field, great lighting. Definitely a mood piece. Didn't get a strong change theme, but then everything is change in a way.

Hugh DiMauro · March 15th, 2008, 04:47 PM

Just like Master Martens has said, that music gives me the shivers. But besides the music, I liked the Hitchcockian crawl through the window. Lighting, camera angles and visuals are very, very good. I kind of agree with Mr. Mays in that the theme just doesn't jump out at me. I suppose our composer had experienced a change in his creative block after being touched by his Angel. God knows I've been touched by an Angel.

Great work. This is a contender.

Josh Chesarek · March 15th, 2008, 05:34 PM

Your film was very well done. It is a shame sometimes to have to watch these films on youtube. I am really thinking about trying to develop a website for us DVCers similar to UWOL where we can have some higher quality video resolutions. Anyway, I really liked the audience in the film and its fade ins and outs. I thought that it was well done and thought out. The music fit perfectly, especially the single cords on the piano opening the piece. Well done.

Tor-Atle Kindsbekken · March 16th, 2008, 08:30 AM

I'm so glad that you all seems to like it in one way or another :-)
I'm so new to movie making and this is my first real piece of work. It's so difficult to be my own judge when I don't have the experience that I think is needed to create some really great work. So all your comments, thoughts and all feedback is so apreciated, folks. Thank you so much for taking the time :-)

JOSH: The youtube quality is really terrible... especially on my clip. I had so tight scedule this time and didn't have time to really optimize it for youtube before the deadline was running out. It would have been absoluteley fantastic if you (or someone) could make a good alternate to youtube where we can add some higher quality videos for the DV Challenge ;-)

Joseph Tran · March 16th, 2008, 10:56 AM

Great lighting, Tor-Atle! It sets such a great mood for the piece. A chilling film, indeed. Please keep up the great work!

Lorinda Norton · March 16th, 2008, 12:15 PM

The idea that an angel can bring about a dramatic creative change? Wonderful! (I need one of those.)

Great job of bringing the real into the surreal and back again without special effects. Or was there ever any real? Hmm…

The shot that dollies away from the piano was my favorite. No wait…perhaps the shot of him falling into the dream (trance?) that goes soft—maybe that was my favorite. Or maybe dollying through the audience—I don’t know; there are too many favorites. :)

This was a very nice film—first effort or otherwise!

Stephen van Vuuren · March 16th, 2008, 01:11 PM

This was my favorite piece of the challenge - great job on a story that fits the length, wonderful mood with music and lightning. Nicely done all around.

Jay Kavi · March 16th, 2008, 10:25 PM

Very slick, Tor-Atle! Loved the cinematography and the music.

Tor-Atle Kindsbekken · March 17th, 2008, 12:51 AM

Gosh... *blush*
You are so cute everybody ;-)

There are so many great films... and so many great people in this challenge... I don't think I've ever been in a community with so many nice people ;-) Now I can't wait to see who the winner is.

The best of luck to all of you ;-)

March 13th, 2008, 11:49 PM	#1
Tor-Atle Kindsbekken Regular Crew Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Norway, Hedmark Posts: 26	Dvc12 - Avancego Waaaaaa... sorry... I didn't see the "DVC Feedback" section until now. I should ofcource have posted this thread sunday... Sorry... I'm new to this... both this forum and film making is new to me... so bare with me ;-) My first DV Challenge entry is out... and this is the second short film I ever make. Please give me some feedback. Any criticism is welcome ;-) Tor-Atle Kindsbekken “Avancego” (Breakthrough) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w-gMTGgLb9s You can also watch it in high quality at: http://www.hysteriah.no/kunst.htm

March 14th, 2008, 12:12 AM	#3
Alex Chamberlain Regular Crew Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Hurricane, UT Posts: 186	This was really a beautiful piece. I thoroughly enjoyed every technical and emotional aspect of it. It looked professional through and through and I just want to congratulate you on pulling it off. The only spot where my mind took a tiny step back and disconnected from the film a bit is where the camera zooms into the angel's face after the audience disappears. The start of the zoom was a bit shaky, especially compared to the super-smooth tracking shots at the beginning of the film. I suppose it's possible that you went for that look on purpose, but my mind still wanted smooth motion there to stay involved. Anyway, that's just a tiny detail in a piece that I thought was otherwise flawless. Amazingly well done. __________________ Get rid of the "Aspiring" in "Aspiring Filmmaker." Shoot it; you're a filmmaker. After that you're just negotiating your budget. (James Cameron paraphrased)

March 15th, 2008, 04:47 PM	#6
Hugh DiMauro Trustee Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Central Florida Posts: 1,207	Haunting. Just like Master Martens has said, that music gives me the shivers. But besides the music, I liked the Hitchcockian crawl through the window. Lighting, camera angles and visuals are very, very good. I kind of agree with Mr. Mays in that the theme just doesn't jump out at me. I suppose our composer had experienced a change in his creative block after being touched by his Angel. God knows I've been touched by an Angel. Great work. This is a contender. __________________ Interesting, if true. And interesting anyway.

March 16th, 2008, 12:15 PM	#10
Lorinda Norton Wrangler Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: Southwest Idaho, USA Posts: 3,066	The idea that an angel can bring about a dramatic creative change? Wonderful! (I need one of those.) Great job of bringing the real into the surreal and back again without special effects. Or was there ever any real? Hmm… The shot that dollies away from the piano was my favorite. No wait…perhaps the shot of him falling into the dream (trance?) that goes soft—maybe that was my favorite. Or maybe dollying through the audience—I don’t know; there are too many favorites. :) This was a very nice film—first effort or otherwise! __________________ Lorinda

March 16th, 2008, 01:11 PM	#11
Stephen van Vuuren Space Hipster Join Date: Oct 2001 Location: Greensboro, NC Posts: 1,508	This was my favorite piece of the challenge - great job on a story that fits the length, wonderful mood with music and lightning. Nicely done all around. __________________ stephen v2 www.insaturnsrings.com

March 14th, 2008, 12:03 AM	#2
Robert Martens Major Player Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Miller Place, NY Posts: 820	This movie gives me goosebumps all over, and that's a good sign. I've watched it three times now, cranking my speakers' volume higher each time. My only criticism would be to move closer to the audience, to perhaps try and fill in that empty gray space at the bottom of the frame when we see them. Maybe set the camera to the right (their right, that is, but screen left), while still remaining in front of them, to have their gaze directed to our right? That's where I imagined the performer during this, so having them looking in that direction works better in my mind. Beyond that, I have no comments of substance. I must ask, do you know where someone in the United States might purchase a copy of that CD? I can read the text on the cover in the high resolution video you have on your site, but honestly I'm still not sure what album title I should be searching for.

March 14th, 2008, 01:39 AM	#4
Tor-Atle Kindsbekken Regular Crew Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Norway, Hedmark Posts: 26	Thanks for the feedback, guys :-) Robert Martens: Great advice! Thanks :-))) Actually I don't know if the CD is for sale outside europe... but I guess not since the lyrics are in norwegian. But I'm not sure... I guess you can email Martin himself and ask him... or maybe you can order the CD directly from him. His email is mkart4sale@hotmail.com. ;-) Alex Chamberlain: Thank you so much! :-))) About the zoom scene at the end: This was a combination of the look I was after... AND a terrible bad (and cheap) dolly that I was using ;-) Because of the effect with the audience disapearing, I couldn't change the image and use the Image stabilizer on that shot like I did with the others ;-) But I was aware of this when shooting... and thought it would be a "cool effect" with shaky camera movement at the end... a littlebit like the "Moulin Rouge effect", you know? ;-) But maybe you're rignt that it would've been better with smooth camera movement in this scene as the rest of the film ;-)

March 15th, 2008, 09:41 AM	#5
Dick Mays Major Player Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Atlanta, GA Posts: 690	Beautiful Piece. Very Professional look. Some great shallow depth of field, great lighting. Definitely a mood piece. Didn't get a strong change theme, but then everything is change in a way.

March 15th, 2008, 05:34 PM	#7
Josh Chesarek Major Player Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Winter Park, FL Posts: 978	Your film was very well done. It is a shame sometimes to have to watch these films on youtube. I am really thinking about trying to develop a website for us DVCers similar to UWOL where we can have some higher quality video resolutions. Anyway, I really liked the audience in the film and its fade ins and outs. I thought that it was well done and thought out. The music fit perfectly, especially the single cords on the piano opening the piece. Well done.

March 16th, 2008, 08:30 AM	#8
Tor-Atle Kindsbekken Regular Crew Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Norway, Hedmark Posts: 26	I'm so glad that you all seems to like it in one way or another :-) I'm so new to movie making and this is my first real piece of work. It's so difficult to be my own judge when I don't have the experience that I think is needed to create some really great work. So all your comments, thoughts and all feedback is so apreciated, folks. Thank you so much for taking the time :-) JOSH: The youtube quality is really terrible... especially on my clip. I had so tight scedule this time and didn't have time to really optimize it for youtube before the deadline was running out. It would have been absoluteley fantastic if you (or someone) could make a good alternate to youtube where we can add some higher quality videos for the DV Challenge ;-)

March 16th, 2008, 10:56 AM	#9
Joseph Tran Regular Crew Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Los Angeles, CA Posts: 177	Great lighting, Tor-Atle! It sets such a great mood for the piece. A chilling film, indeed. Please keep up the great work!

March 16th, 2008, 10:25 PM	#12
Jay Kavi Major Player Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: San Francisco, CA Posts: 243	Very slick, Tor-Atle! Loved the cinematography and the music.

March 17th, 2008, 12:51 AM	#13
Tor-Atle Kindsbekken Regular Crew Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Norway, Hedmark Posts: 26	Gosh... blush You are so cute everybody ;-) There are so many great films... and so many great people in this challenge... I don't think I've ever been in a community with so many nice people ;-) Now I can't wait to see who the winner is. The best of luck to all of you ;-)