Lucid - Scene 3 preview

[Tatsuya Graham]

This is a little scene that I am posting up that I am directing/editing and filming.. It is called lucid...The description is on the youtube page. It was filmd with the gl2.

enjoy.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=1wyice2yWKE

[Lyndon Horsfall]

It's not badly shot, but honestly, I think two things are killing that scene. Your actors and your editing. The acting is very stilted, no emotion, and both your actors have memorized what they're doing...not being in the moment at all.

The editing is too deliberate. Someone will say something, you'll cut to the cup, then cut to the other person for the response. For the 2 seconds you're hanging on the cup, what are the characters doing? Staring at each other? The verbal response should start when you cut to the cup, with the last half of the sentence when you cut to the close up of the person speaking. Overall, there's too much time between verbal responses. The dit definitely needs to be tightened up. Also, there's a quick 1-2-3 cut near the end and it ruins the pacing of the whole thing.

However, you do show promise in your framing and, despite my hopefully contructive criticism, your editing. You know basically what you're doing in terms of visually telling a story, but your editing must keep a flow and have purpose towards the characterization. It's obvious with more practice and experience, and better actors, you could probably create something really good.

[Tatsuya Graham]

Thank you for the comment, I'm glad you brought up the editing. Can you explain a little more what was wrong with it, I really need to improve. Like what did you mean by deliberate?






~Tatsuya graham

[Michael Ferreira]

Hey Tatsuya,

i have to agree with lyndon... how long is the final production going to be...
the reason i ask is because it's very very dry.. the acting is just not believable. You have two young kids and one seems to maybe be a detective and the other a businessman. I cant buy it... i might be wrong with the pilot idea and if i am then sorry. Now you seem to have an eye for the camera even tho your editing needs some work you seemed to be very creative with your shots and i liked that... it was enjoyable to see what you would do next. but thats coming from my point of view what about the viewer whom might not be analyzing your video will they just be bored.

your audio was a little off to me... if you might i have an idea... it seems like you asked permission to use the restaurant (not be scared to ask to shoot in locations is the best asset to yourself). ask if you can come in early and shoot it again with out the background noise. it seems when you mix the cuts you hear the background audio skip. then go in when they are open and just record background noise and add that over the voice track it will give you more control.

please don't think i'm bashing on your video i am not... but if your anything like me when the video is done you will say S*** i should have done this differently.

tell your actors to relax. they don't act that way when you go out to grab a burger so why act that way when the red light is on.

most important stay true to yourself...

and please forgive me if any of that sounded like i was trying to be rude all i wanted to do was give you a few motivational tips. others might not be so forgiving... it's a lot of hard work shooting a video so make sure you don't stress yourself to much.

good work and good luck

~Mike

[Todd Clark]

You did a really nice job with the camera! If you don't mind me asking, how did you get the look of the shots? Did you use any filters in Post?

[Tatsuya Graham]

Thanks Mike, I really do agree with you. Today we did film a scene and the smae stuff happened. I tried to talk to the actors and explain that they need to be more "into" the moment and not just be dry and boring with no emotion. They seem to always get mad at me when ever I try to say "Wait, guys, we need to do this again because of blah blah". They never want to listen to me. At one point today, I got reaaaalllly mad because my friend spit and some of the spit got on the camera lens, luckily I had on the uv filter...But still, I was extremely mad and went of on them...Everytime I try to explain something about their acting, they seem to just throw it back in their face. They always think that they are right. There are some points in some scenes that are extremely horrible acting and I am surprised that they can't see it.
By the way, the guy with the green shirt on in the vid actually took acting classes, he should understand what Im talking about, but doesnt.


Todd, Thanks for the comment, All I did in post was boost brightness and contrast and added an underwater filter in after effects.

[Michael Ferreira]

Tatsuya,

Looks like your really being held back by the actors. I know the feeling they think they can act and direct the entire thing on there own.

are there any drama students near by you can bring in... Say " hey this wont pay but the plot is great and it would be a great video to put your name on" if that wont work call up a drama teacher and ask him to ask some of his students if they would be willing to do a video... i do that all the time and sometimes the teachers even give extra credit...

and ask you friends/other actors if they still care todo the project, sit them down tell them that your target for the video is to do X,X,X,X (x your project goal) if they are still listening after that point show them by movie clips what you need them to do.

act yourself show them what you want. if they cant do it .. don't risk the rest of your film on them.

take it from me.. if your first video does not make you happy it will be hard to mentally pick yourself back up and get currage to grab that camera and do something else.

fell free to ask questions if you have them..

~Mike

[Lyndon Horsfall]

Originally Posted by Tatsuya Graham

Thank you for the comment, I'm glad you brought up the editing. Can you explain a little more what was wrong with it, I really need to improve. Like what did you mean by deliberate?

Your editing is much like the acting, it's planned and rigid and has no flow.

One of the many keys to acting is working in the flow of things. Bad actors memorize their script at home, think about what they'll do and what they like. They'll watch themselves in the mirror and see how they think they look best. Then, they memorize that performance. When they get to set, instead looking at the set design or location and asking themselves why their character chose to be here, instead of honestly reacting to the person their character is interacting with and tailoring their performance to the organic feel of the moment, they just play the role the way they've memorized it, with no thought as to whether that performance plays true to the other characters or the location or the moment.

Your editing is the same way. You've planned the edit and don't seem to have found an organic flow to what you ended up having. When you cut to the CU of the coffee cup, why did you cut to that? You should have a valid answer. But mainly, you need to do audio editing. One actor asks a question, then you cut to the cup...beat on the cup...then cut to the other actor responding. In real life, a person's answer to a question does not wait for you to look at the cup. If you know what I mean.