I would laugh at them lol. On a serious matter I don't deal with wedding planners when I am shooting a wedding. We deal directly with the couples for numerous reasons. Once I explain to out couples why we do not deal with planners they are totally fine with it. I'm not saying anything bad about wedding planners. We get to know our couples on a personal level before we shoot with them. We meet with them, go out for supper, skype chats etc. Showing up to shoot a wedding for a couple you know nothing about is extremely hard.Specially if all you know about them is from a wedding planner. So I wouldn't pay for a referral I would send them a nice thank you telling them you will refer all clients to them in the future.And I would write a post about them in your blog that is usually a good way of saying thanks. When another vendors writes good things about your service its worth more then a few dollars in my book.

Jason

I think you are missing the point. It's not we have to deal with the wedding planner on wedding day. It's the wedding planner asks for referral fee before they will send you the customer.

In my opinion, any person asking for a referral fee is really offering you the opportunity to have a sales representative on a commission basis. If the planner thinks he/she is a professional sales representative, then I would ask for a resume. A good sales rep is worth 10%, tops, for a small business owner, in my opinion. 4%-7% might be a more realistic negotiating number.
You might well be better off connecting with a church organization or a collection of banquet venues. In either case, your services are "value added" connections to their operations, and hopefully less expensive, at least initially.

In either case, I would insist upon a contract specifically stating a minimum value on an annual basis for referrals that result in a signed contract, as well as an escape clause for referrals that are not legitimate.

Walk away
 

I would say no thanks. I refer people to the planner and the planner refer people back to me. We both win, no such fee. I occasionally send the planner and couples that referring me to their friends and loved ones with tickets to wine tasting or gift certificate to restaurant but other than that I will not pay for any fee to the planner. If my planner ever asked for it, i will say NO.