How to reply to a forum member who’s being rude and insulting. at DVinfo.net

Allan Black · October 17th, 2024, 10:44 PM

When I was a moderator on the now defunct Panasonic 3CCDuser.com site for 4years, early on a couple of us mods. wrote a reply for any forum member who was being put down and insulted by another member.

We had admin. control panels to warn or ban any members, but we thought this was more fun for our people and less trouble for us mods. Here it is …

‘On the forum when a member is being rude and insulting you, here’s what you should do. On the notepad on your computer, write a reply, address it to the culprit make it as nasty as you like using all the profanity you can muster. Make it as long as you like, leaving no doubt his ramblings and opinions should be taken with a grain of salt but more likely, dismissed altogether.’

Get it all out of your system, but don’t log in and post it. For laughs leave it on your notepad for a couple of days then just delete it.

Cheers.

Andrew Smith · October 17th, 2024, 10:58 PM

And add some Python-esque insults for good measure. :-)

Andrew

Allan Black · October 21st, 2024, 12:19 AM

Hi Andrew and others, here’s another ploy which works. On the forum, if you receive a really nasty reply to your post, make sure the culprit has logged off, login and write a similar reply, post yours and log off.

Then wait EXACTLY 5 minutes, log in and delete it, replace it with a nice apologetic, ‘Gee I’m really sorry you feel that way, etc. etc.’ and post that.

In the previous 5 minutes the DVinfo system will have emailed the culprit that he’s received a reply, your nasty one. The chances are when he angrily logs in and reads your apologetic post, he’ll be totally nonplussed. On the Panasonic3CCDuser.com site we once saw that happen and we never saw the culprit again.
Cheers.

Boyd Ostroff · October 23rd, 2024, 03:56 AM

I'm a moderator at macrumors.com, which is the biggest site for discussing Apple and their products (aside from apple.com), with over a million members and more than 10,000 posts a day. It's like the polar opposite of DVinfo. :-)

We deal with rude and insulting forum members every day and I wish the solution was that easy! It's really amazing how carried away some people get. We have rules and procedures for all this, but on some days it's a real blow to my hopes for the future to see people behaving so badly.

One guy joined, immediately insulted several people and then complained about having his posts deleted. So, he started reporting every post he didn't like from other people and we finally suspended him. Next he started spamming the MacRumors contact page with complaints and insults. But he didn't stop there, he went to the MacRumors Wikipedia page and spammed it with complaints about free speech.

A few minutes later, after we perma-banned him and fixed the damage, he sends us this. Nice, but we didn't let him back in.

"Hi macrumors team,
I'd like to start off by issuing an apology. This doesn't excuse my actions, I'm aware of that, but I would like to let you know that I have been going through a rough patch and just kinda lashed out as a result of that."

By the way, with modern forum software (such as Xenforo) the moderators will still be able to see that over-the-top nasty message you wrote and then later deleted (there's a "history" button that shows all your edits). So you might want to put your insults in Notepad instead of posting and deleting them online. :-)

Allan Black · October 23rd, 2024, 05:39 PM

I hate to ask Boyd, not how much but are being paid? Our Panasonic3CCDuser.com site was started when about 2000 Panny released their GS400 camcorder, a big step forward in video quality.

Robin Liss who started CamcorderInfo.com in 1997, figured she’d start 2 satellite sites, Sony.com and P3U our site, thereby tripling her advertising base.

I joined P3U in June 2004, writing my stuff and was invited to become a mod. With the time difference from Sydney, I was the Night Shift Moderator for the northern hemisphere where most of our members were. There was 5 mods and it was great fun, on our control panels we could warn any member or ban him or her for 12hrs, 48hrs, 7 days or forever.

One time we were hacked off the internet, but soon reinstated with urgent updates to the software. Another time we were invaded by a disruptive ‘athletics club’ from Ohio, before we recognised them all and rooted them out risking being attacked on another site. But consensus was they had to go.

As I recall we didn’t have to ban any other members, though as the night mod. I did warn a few for offensive language. But we only reached about 1500 members when in December 2008, Robin Liss closed both sites quoting “Lack of resources.”

Cheers.

Boyd Ostroff · Yesterday, 12:14 PM

Haha... moderators and administrators at MacRumors are volunteers. There can be some benefits, but nothing in proportion to the amount of time spent. However, that's completely flexible and it's a fun group of people to work with. The main website has a paid editorial and techical staff, but the forums are separate (although we do interact with each other).

I'm a "moderator in name only" here at DVinfo. But I still remember the days when things got nasty and out of hand right here. That may have been a couple years before you joined? But it was crazy, people attacking each other in Canon vs Sony threads and 4:3 vs 16:9 rants. Kept the mods busy and more than one person got a "time out" back then!

Then there was GPSReview.net where I was a moderator for years. It just sort of wilted and died as people moved to smartphones and one day... it was gone. Back in the day, I got a % of the site advertising however. Not big deal, I think the most I ever made in a year was $600 which quickly tapered down to nothing.

Still a mod at gpsfiledepot.net, but (literally) 99% of the forum posts are spam which I have to manually delete (terrible forum software!).

Also a mod/admin at a small forum where people in my region (Southern NJ) discuss local issues, nature, recreation, history, etc. Generally a really friendly, relaxed place but every now and then.... And it's amazing the amount of spammers that try to register on this little site. Fortunately, it also runs on Xenforo which is pretty good at keeping the spammers out.

October 17th, 2024, 10:44 PM	#1
Allan Black Inner Circle Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Sydney. Posts: 2,908	How to reply to a forum member who’s being rude and insulting. When I was a moderator on the now defunct Panasonic 3CCDuser.com site for 4years, early on a couple of us mods. wrote a reply for any forum member who was being put down and insulted by another member. We had admin. control panels to warn or ban any members, but we thought this was more fun for our people and less trouble for us mods. Here it is … ‘On the forum when a member is being rude and insulting you, here’s what you should do. On the notepad on your computer, write a reply, address it to the culprit make it as nasty as you like using all the profanity you can muster. Make it as long as you like, leaving no doubt his ramblings and opinions should be taken with a grain of salt but more likely, dismissed altogether.’ Get it all out of your system, but don’t log in and post it. For laughs leave it on your notepad for a couple of days then just delete it. Cheers. __________________ Drink more tap water. On admission at Sydney hospitals more than 5% of day patients are de-hydrated.

October 17th, 2024, 10:58 PM	#2
Andrew Smith Equal Opportunity Offender Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Brisbane, Australia Posts: 3,057	Re: How to reply to a forum member who’s being rude and insulting. And add some Python-esque insults for good measure. :-) Andrew

October 21st, 2024, 12:19 AM	#3
Allan Black Inner Circle Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Sydney. Posts: 2,908	Re: How to reply to a forum member who’s being rude and insulting. Hi Andrew and others, here’s another ploy which works. On the forum, if you receive a really nasty reply to your post, make sure the culprit has logged off, login and write a similar reply, post yours and log off. Then wait EXACTLY 5 minutes, log in and delete it, replace it with a nice apologetic, ‘Gee I’m really sorry you feel that way, etc. etc.’ and post that. In the previous 5 minutes the DVinfo system will have emailed the culprit that he’s received a reply, your nasty one. The chances are when he angrily logs in and reads your apologetic post, he’ll be totally nonplussed. On the Panasonic3CCDuser.com site we once saw that happen and we never saw the culprit again. Cheers. __________________ Drink more tap water. On admission at Sydney hospitals more than 5% of day patients are de-hydrated.

October 23rd, 2024, 03:56 AM	#4
Boyd Ostroff Wrangler Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Mays Landing, NJ Posts: 11,796	Re: How to reply to a forum member who’s being rude and insulting. I'm a moderator at macrumors.com, which is the biggest site for discussing Apple and their products (aside from apple.com), with over a million members and more than 10,000 posts a day. It's like the polar opposite of DVinfo. :-) We deal with rude and insulting forum members every day and I wish the solution was that easy! It's really amazing how carried away some people get. We have rules and procedures for all this, but on some days it's a real blow to my hopes for the future to see people behaving so badly. One guy joined, immediately insulted several people and then complained about having his posts deleted. So, he started reporting every post he didn't like from other people and we finally suspended him. Next he started spamming the MacRumors contact page with complaints and insults. But he didn't stop there, he went to the MacRumors Wikipedia page and spammed it with complaints about free speech. A few minutes later, after we perma-banned him and fixed the damage, he sends us this. Nice, but we didn't let him back in. "Hi macrumors team, I'd like to start off by issuing an apology. This doesn't excuse my actions, I'm aware of that, but I would like to let you know that I have been going through a rough patch and just kinda lashed out as a result of that." By the way, with modern forum software (such as Xenforo) the moderators will still be able to see that over-the-top nasty message you wrote and then later deleted (there's a "history" button that shows all your edits). So you might want to put your insults in Notepad instead of posting and deleting them online. :-)

October 23rd, 2024, 05:39 PM	#5
Allan Black Inner Circle Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Sydney. Posts: 2,908	Re: How to reply to a forum member who’s being rude and insulting. I hate to ask Boyd, not how much but are being paid? Our Panasonic3CCDuser.com site was started when about 2000 Panny released their GS400 camcorder, a big step forward in video quality. Robin Liss who started CamcorderInfo.com in 1997, figured she’d start 2 satellite sites, Sony.com and P3U our site, thereby tripling her advertising base. I joined P3U in June 2004, writing my stuff and was invited to become a mod. With the time difference from Sydney, I was the Night Shift Moderator for the northern hemisphere where most of our members were. There was 5 mods and it was great fun, on our control panels we could warn any member or ban him or her for 12hrs, 48hrs, 7 days or forever. One time we were hacked off the internet, but soon reinstated with urgent updates to the software. Another time we were invaded by a disruptive ‘athletics club’ from Ohio, before we recognised them all and rooted them out risking being attacked on another site. But consensus was they had to go. As I recall we didn’t have to ban any other members, though as the night mod. I did warn a few for offensive language. But we only reached about 1500 members when in December 2008, Robin Liss closed both sites quoting “Lack of resources.” Cheers. __________________ Drink more tap water. On admission at Sydney hospitals more than 5% of day patients are de-hydrated.

Yesterday, 12:14 PM	#6
Boyd Ostroff Wrangler Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Mays Landing, NJ Posts: 11,796	Re: How to reply to a forum member who’s being rude and insulting. Haha... moderators and administrators at MacRumors are volunteers. There can be some benefits, but nothing in proportion to the amount of time spent. However, that's completely flexible and it's a fun group of people to work with. The main website has a paid editorial and techical staff, but the forums are separate (although we do interact with each other). I'm a "moderator in name only" here at DVinfo. But I still remember the days when things got nasty and out of hand right here. That may have been a couple years before you joined? But it was crazy, people attacking each other in Canon vs Sony threads and 4:3 vs 16:9 rants. Kept the mods busy and more than one person got a "time out" back then! Then there was GPSReview.net where I was a moderator for years. It just sort of wilted and died as people moved to smartphones and one day... it was gone. Back in the day, I got a % of the site advertising however. Not big deal, I think the most I ever made in a year was $600 which quickly tapered down to nothing. Still a mod at gpsfiledepot.net, but (literally) 99% of the forum posts are spam which I have to manually delete (terrible forum software!). Also a mod/admin at a small forum where people in my region (Southern NJ) discuss local issues, nature, recreation, history, etc. Generally a really friendly, relaxed place but every now and then.... And it's amazing the amount of spammers that try to register on this little site. Fortunately, it also runs on Xenforo which is pretty good at keeping the spammers out.