I made a mistake and recorded one camera (not alot thank god) in 4:3. The project it is for is all 16:9, so how can I cheat and blow up the 4:3 and crop it so when rendered out it has the same black bars as the 16:9 footage? I remember there may have been a template for that somewhere?

Just blow up your 4:3 footage so that it fills the frame width wize(I blow it up to 134% in PP2.0). Click this link (http://www.dvinfo.net/conf/showpost.php?p=690211&postcount=4) and save the image to your Hard Drive. Then drop the .png file into your timeline above the 4:3 footage and your good to go.

am i supposed to make the aspect ratio on the matte 1.2 as well? Its not covering all the way across the screen

The matte should be 720x480. Did you just save the thumbnail? You need to click the thumbnail and save the full size image.