“Lord, hep me—I don’t wanta do this.” But everyone else had the guts to start a feedback thread, so here it is.

Just to save a little space I will explain an obvious omission. You didn’t see anything through the eye of the Handycam because I.…um….recorded over it.

And then the only battery I had really did go dead.

It’s a long story.

"Oh lord, why did I enter this contest? You want me to be embarassed in front of my peers don't you? No you wouldn't want that would you? Well, in the old testement, he was vengeful. What did I do to incur the wrath of the almighty? All I did was enter this little online video/film short contest...I mean, what did I ever do to him that he wants me to loose so miserably? I too am doomed. Man, I truely am the weakest link."

So goes the dialog in my head after watching 14 of the best shorts I have seen in this contest.

As everyone else in this effort so far, excellent. Great mood. You can tell, when I get sucked into the story line that fast, I like it. Normally I can sit back and look at things with a level of removal. Not this one. The dry(ish) humor is exactly what I like. Well acted and shot. The file I downloaded however had some rough spots playing back on my work PC. It might be one of several things but over all, another great short.

Sean McHenry

well, shoot, long stories are why we are here! the agony and the ecstasy!

i thought this was pretty good...a coupla chuckles in there is not such a bad achievement for a coupla (days? hours?) work. your actors were pretty good. did you give them a situation? or a complete script?

i think we get overly attached to our vision or our expectations and forget that the video has its own integrity independent of any of those things. for instance, that videographer who made "erasure" failed to capture his sound, and in some ways, his story might have actually worked better without it. one of the things i actually love about making videos is the way unexpected things creep into our work, making it its own thing. the serendipitous convergence of unanticipated coincidence.

also, as a fan of minimalist storytelling, i kinda liked these two clowns waiting for godot. hey man, if it's good enough for samuel beckett....!

right now, speed and special effects are the vogue. but the wheel always turns. maybe you are the avant-garde, just don't know it yet.

one of my personal all-time favorite films is david lynch's "the straight story" (starring the fabulous richard farnsworth) two hours of watching an old guy riding a tractor. and lynch makes a fantastic movie out of it!

i keep saying, sometimes less is more, but boys with new toys don't always appreciate the sentiment!

be nice to your little video. there's more there than you think.

Hey Lorinda from Spudville!

Way to go... That was hilarious! Totally got the hick thing happening...I'm proud of you. Us hick types need to stick together...lol

You had a beautiful crane/pan shot at the opener. And that sun shot definitely contributed well to the hot and dry feeling of your film. I found the dialog perfectly believable and well written.

Loved the ending too and the additional "HEP" deal. You see, I know people like this. You've got to love 'em.

Thank you so much for sharing your movie. Excellent job!

Very nice... these guys didn't seem to have any trouble in the world.. oh.. nothing big.. we are just gonna die... :)

Really liked this. Nice opening shots with the panning and the sun shot. Did the guy really mispell at the end or was it good acting ?, looked to me like he really got it wrong.

Thank you, kind folks, for taking it easy on me. I felt pretty dumb after seeing the other movies to this point.

@ Sean: Oh, the angst!! Mr. Reigning Champ, you have secured your place in DV Challenge history as a proven moviemaker. That is so cool.

I'm happy that you got into the story; coming from you that's quite a compliment. Interesting to see whose minds tune in to the intentions.

@ Meryem: Thank you so much for lifting up this meager effort! I loved reading your insight and opinions. After my other misfires in this challenge I promised my son that I would slow things down and zero in on a simple concept. After watching it he said, "Well....you certainly kept it slow and simple." I think maybe I went too far for many tastes. :)

You already know the answer to your question about the dialogue. I gave the guys a one-page "script" and told them to improvise. They have more fun that way. Basically, I was just there to capture whatever they did and offered very little direction. And I only had a three-hour window with them for shooting.

@ Bradley: If anyone would understand it would be my fellow hickster! Thank you so much for the support.

@ Fredrik: LOL! Believe it or not, many of us who grew up out here in Idaho are kind of like that! "Stuff happens.....deal with it." :)

EDIT: Andrew, that is funny! I'll have to tell Jeff and Mason what you said. The boys actually planned that out, so that's quite a compliment to their acting. :)

Nice job Lorinda. Mason and Jeff remind me of several friends I have from the south. Not a care in the world. You captured the essence of hicks in a perfect way. I can say that cause all my family comes from the south. Keep up the good work.

Lorinda, I enjoyed your work. First of all, this feedback comes from a relative newby to the video world, and a guy who's still learning more than doing.

As much as I am card carrying guy (meaning fire, explosions and toilet humour still entertain me) my favourite movies always come back to one thing...they tell a good story. As a planet, we are all caught up a circular, (and speeding up), vortex of technology, just-in-time need it yesterday mentality, and disposable everything. So when I downloaded and watched your clip, I was immediately struck by the difference. One location and two guys telling a story. Your opening post in this thread actually made me laugh as much the piece itself...oh the irony.

:))

That was dumber and dumbest on a squirrel chase. HEP me if i'm wrong, but that was plain absolute fun. I believe that one of the things that turns a concept into something of quality is when you get to worry on the details ("...and jeff" / "...with jeff!" etc). Those small things make or break the fun out of the movie.

Yours was very accomplished.

Hugo

Oh man, you guys are just makin' my day! Thank you so much.

Hugo, you hit the nail on the head with that "dumber and dumbest" statement. Just what we were thinking, too.

And Dennis...what a cool read. Interesting insight and good writing! I see you appreciate dry humor.

About the family down South, Sean B.--is that why you live in L.A.? ;)

They claim to live in L.A. too. Lower Alabama. Hahaha. They get me everytime I visit.

Just right the dialogue among the 2. I thought at the very beginning that the shots would drag, but as the delivery slowed, the pace picked up. Wow.
Only critique would be the choice to use dissolves instead of cuts where the time is constant.
Nice work.

Only critique would be the choice to use dissolves instead of cuts where the time is constant.

That's exactly what my best friend said to me!!! Guess I'd better take another look at it.
Thanks, Jimmy!! :)

Lorinda,

I LOVED IT! "maw, dad, it's been nice knowing you and all..."

But I don't get why these city folks keep calling them "hicks?"
Ain't they never been squirrel huntin?

Dick

I felt pretty dumb after seeing the other movies to this point.

No need for that. Although it has no bearing on the outcome of the contest, your's was the only film that I watched 4 times. I kept laughing my ass off at "HEP" each time. I wish it was longer. Save those characters for DVC4.

I was just showing the ones I liked best to my wife and actress/daughter. We all liked yours. Dylan is right, I like it a lot.

The cliche thing to do would to have shot them with a fake record light and so on and have that shot blink out when the battery goes. However, I like not having done that.

Sean

Hi Lorinda,
Great job...this is one I know I will come back to again and again, it is an absolute pleasure to watch. Very funny, and I think you have a couple of keepers for characters (assuming they get saved) I can imagine them finding themselves in all sorts of precarious dilemmas and the little shorts that could be produced to illustrate that. It was hilarious.

"Who you gonna write to out here?" great line.

Also, the opening pan shot - very nice.

Well done!
-Jon

Funny thing about words. Early this morning I had decided to tell the guys that I wasn't doing anymore challenges because I didn't want to keep clogging up the field with sub-par entries. When I went online I was mortified to find this movie posted today--I didn't expect it until tomorrow!

All through the day I've felt better, thanks to the kind feedback. Now, tonight, I find one of my favorite comedians (yeah, that's you, D.C.) telling me to keep Jeff & Mason around for DVC4, and I read these other very encouraging words, as well. Kind of gave me that "Sally Field" feeling! ;)

Guess entertainment comes in all forms--for some it can even come from the hands and gear of a perennial amateur who happens to have gifted friends. I love it!

What a cool community we have here. Thank you.......so much.

And I will talk to the guys about another performance. Somehow I don't feel like I'll have to do a lot of arm-twisting. :)

Great job. I liked the characters chemistry. They are good together. It was funny. Hep :-)

it was great, i really enjoyed watching those two interact, i like the fact that you didn't put in footage from the handy cam by accident or not it worked for me...music was perfect as well...

don't stop making these...

Funny thing about words. Early this morning I had decided to tell the guys that I wasn't doing anymore challenges because I didn't want to keep clogging up the field with sub-par entries.

Last Words is definitely not sub-par!
You'd better enter DVC4 or I won't run it and then everyone will blame you and then you'll feel really bad. So you have to enter. :)

Sub par, sheesh. Not a chance.

I have noticed a few minor things watching it again the other night with the wife and kiddie. The audio seems to pan full left when the one guy is rooting around in the truck for paper. I haven't really listened to it all that well but there is something up with the audio for a few seconds there. Not too big an issue but if you were doing a final version as a keeper you might want to look at that.

Sean

LOL, Dylan! Gosh, we can't let that happen, now can we? Wiseguy... ;)
But thank you so much for validating this work. It'll make me try harder.

Sean, yeah, that darned audio really ate my lunch. I'm still scratching my head wondering how that panning thing happened. And when I tried to work with the waveforms (in Vegas) I couldn't get good results, so I gave up. Besides, I had more pressing troubles with wind noise there at the last main sequence. Had to EQ the dickens out of it in order to get the roar out.

I may mess with it again--thanks.

To Robert Mann Z.: Always a pleasure reading your comments, and affirmation coming from you means a lot. Thank you.

Richard, I wish you'd fill in the blank on your location. I'm telling the guys what everyone said, and they're having a blast seeing the "reaches of their appeal." LOL!!!

Lorinda, I loved the line "Never go squirrel hunting with one gallon of gas." That cracked me up. :) Living in Indiana, I see those two characters almost every day!

The way you set the scene drew me in from the start--the truck with the hood up, the gas cap door open, and the guys roasting in the hot sun. It was clear what was going on in 10 seconds. It is hard to convey so much in so little time. Well done!

I also loved the fact that they had this wonderful piece of technology to record their last words yet the battery was almost dead. Isn't that the way it would probably be. Your ending was also classic. When the camera stopped in mid sentence, I cracked up loud. It reminds me of many a wildlife shoot when I'm about o get some great animal behavior and then the battery dies.

Great job overall!

Lorinda,
I read what you had said about the wind noise issue in another thread. Take a look at Markertek (or our sponsors sites) and see if you can find a wind sock to match your mic type(s). Some makers are quite expensive, like Sennheisers "blimps". I found mine, a Mic Muff, here: http://www.markertek.com/SearchProduct.asp?item=MUFF%2D1&off=15&sort=prod

$40 is pretty cheap and yet it works wonders.

Sean McHenry

Hey Jeff,
Knowing this little movie made you laugh just makes my day! Thank you for the nice comments!! -- Lorinda

Sean, I tried a "muff" once and thought it did just that--muffled the audio I did want even though the wind noise was filtered out. Is this wrong? Anyway, because of that one incident I scrapped that idea. I didn't take enough helpers for this movie (the wind wasn't blowing when we struck off for the middle of nowhere!) to block it. You've not had the other problem with your muff?

If they are made right, they are supposed to be transparent to sound. The fibers on the fuzzy thing are there to keep air from hitting the diaphram of the mic. I suppose off axis air blowing accross a mic is the real problem. I don't think they will help much on a handheld omni or lav type mic. The windscreens there are mostly to keep the talent from popping when they speak.

Mine has been pretty good for me. I leave it on all the time now. Besides, it's too hard to take off and on.

Sean