Are there any third party filters for vegas that could maipulte image (read: cheat) to achieve 35mm depth of field effect? I use Vegas "radial blur" sometimes but it is far from what was desired. Thanks in advance

Take a look at Video Essentials II (http://www.newbluefx.com/video-essentials-ii.html) from NewBlueFX for the effect called Rack Focus.
This is a package with several other FX as well.
A trial version is available.

Magic Bullet Looks also has some useful tools, specifically the Tilt-Shift effect.