A dear friend of mine, Jon Brown (son of Steadicam inventor Garrett Brown and a fierce DP in his own right) was testing a piece of software that aids in creating eBay ads, and he placed this fanciful bit of business (http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=2222451352&ssPageName=ADME:X:ON:US:2) up for auction. Outside of it being a fun read, I am on a quest to blow his mind by having as many bids take place on this as possible. I implore all fun-loving DVI'ers to bid in the lowest possible increments if you have the time or inclination. I wouldn't worry about the final result, i.e. winning and having to worry about shipping or anything like that, it's just a lark. Thank you in advance,

Haha! Next to the 'no dings and scratches line' it should also say, "No pre-existing bite marks" - just for good measure.

The beat goes on--some 37 bids have been logged today on this item. Folks have been firing questions over to JB, who firmly believes that all of this is due to a spontaneous viral campaign...some of the responses as posted on other boards are pretty classic:

> Hi. I had a couple of questions for you:

>
> 1. Is this the later "mark II" model or the earlier more desireable
> "mark I"?

This is a "Mark I" model
>
> 2. Has anything or anyone famous been involved with this item?

The girl who played the Daughter in "Coach" once had her demo reels
tapes on the shelf that this pencil has been stored on. Also, Garrett
Brown, the inventor of the Steadicaam, once briefly glanced at the
pencil in question.
>
> 3. Do you have any unsharpened? They are worth more this way.

This pencil was acquired already sharpened
>
> 4. This one seem from the photo to be sharpened in the southern
> style. Do you have any in the eastern asian style?

The Pencil would not qualify for OSHA safety standards if it was
sharpened in the E.A. Style, so we are unable to offer them to our US
customers
>
> 5. What is the serial number?

#2
>
> 6. What kind of batteries does it take and how many?

No batteries are require for normal use of the pencil All other uses
would immediately void the warranty.
>
> 7. Since I lost all of the fingers on both hands in a horrible
> motorcycle accident involving a gasoline truck, do you have any
> additional devices to make this "disabled friendl"y for me?

See attached picture:


The attached picture was of duct tape.

I really wanted to bid but my wife said NO more video stuff. I tried to explain the purpose of the item was far more than just video use but she was having none of it so I'm out. Darn!

Charles,thank you for posting this. This is THE best thread I've read in a couple of days.
Don

What the hell is a pencil?

Don't know what it is but there seems to be a large Black Market demand for the only remaining one.

Whatever it is, please have it returned to the Smithsonian where it will be received, no questions asked!

I sent this question to him. If it isn't, I may retract my bid...

"Hi
Can you tell me if this is IEEE 1394 and USB 2 compliant? I can't see any interface ports in the auction pictures?
Thanks"

His reply:
> Honestly, i don't think so. At least not USB 2, because the item was
> built long before USB was around. IEEE 1394, though, I couldn't say.
> Sorry I can't be more helpful...


My reply:

Thanks
It is a wireless device though, right?

Sounds like he may be getting tired--it's been a long day of responding to emails for him...!

He replied back:

The only wireless function of this machine is the optional remote
control set-up, which is not included. This only allows you to play,
pause, scan etc...


I'll leave him alone now. :)
I threw a bid on there, but sadly was outbid.

There are fees assiciated with selling an item on ebay. Some of them are based on what an item sells for.

I don't know how he formatted his auction, but bear that in mind before you bid?


Cute though.

Dylan:

It appears that you may have responded to the wrong auction--JB is also selling a 3/4" deck and was actually trying to give you serious answers about that item rather than non-sequiteurs re: the pencil! He apologizes and promises to be more comical in the future.

p.s. pencil currently at $40.00...

Who would be so stupid as to bid $40 on a pencil?

Robert,
Your question is like asking the meaning of life or even like asking why is the world so upset about Janet Jacksons boob being exposed for less than the time it takes to blink, you know, the really important stuff.
As someone once said, "there's one born every minute"
$40 for a pencil?
It better a really NICE pencil!

satire included in this post ;-()

Don

My question sent to the seller?

"Does this device come with the gold colored band that holds the attached eraser in place? And is it the gold colored band with the critical red stripe?

Thanks"

Robert KS's post id funny cause HE bid $40.00

HEHEHEH

Marc

This is the answer I got

"Yes, the gold colored metal device is included, and we only offer the
more desirable version with the red band. Please note that there is no
real gold on the pencil"

Good sport

Marc

Question:

Can this "pencil" be upgraded at a later date to use ink? Will this
require the purchase of any convertors or will it need to be
completely retro-fitted?

Answer:

Upgrades: The upgrade is free, but you must have a Pencil with
upgradable bays available. The new Pencil v.2.0.1 ($259.99) is
available and upgradable. The item for auction, unfortunately, is the
older, non-upgradable version. Important note: once transition to
v.2.0.1 is complete, older models of the Pencil will no longer be
compatible with newer writing surfaces that have been optimized for
v.2.0.1. The item for auction will, however, remain a good choice if
you plan on mainly using it for chewing. hope this helps!

Conclusion:

I hope someone gives him the $40.00, for sheer entertainment value.

<<<-- Originally posted by Charles Papert : Dylan:

It appears that you may have responded to the wrong auction--JB is also selling a 3/4" deck and was actually trying to give you serious answers about that item rather than non-sequiteurs re: the pencil! He apologizes and promises to be more comical in the future.

p.s. pencil currently at $40.00... -->>>

LOL!
That's almost as funny!

Thank Christ somebody outbid me.

Bwaaaahahaha

I laughed when you bid, but to actually go through with it!

I wonder who outbid you, I expected Charles to swoop in at the last minute and bid 43,000 for it to get us all off the hook.

Maybe it was Chas by another name. Or his special lady.

<<<-- Originally posted by Robert Knecht Schmidt : Or his special lady. -->>>

You mean his Steadicam?

:)

I heard he traded that in for a bullhorn, a folding chair, and a black beret.

Not just yet gents, not just yet...strapping on the ol' torture device for a little West Wing action tomorrow. At least I have some solid DP work coming up, I get to hire an operator to do the heavy lifting on that one!